#if miss high really does watch this with me she's just probably gonna be like oh my god this bitch...................

[lucimaaie]

missed you ✧.* tlou

pairings - ellie williams x fem!reader

summary - ellie was just missing you when you showed up at her doorstep

warning - short & not proofread as always

being ellie's ex was no doubt awkward. more at the beginning when everything's fresh and you just have to get used to not being together anymore. seeing something that reminds you of her or not being able to knock on her door and say. "i just need you right now."

then a couple months pass, a year, then three and things were normal. relatively normal for exes, ellie guessed. you didn't talk much besides what was needed or when you happened to end up together.

ellie wasn’t going to admit that she missed you. you were her first relationship, sure. that mattered, she knew that, but something in her head told her she needed to not need you. that that was the mature thing to do: not needing your ex-girlfriend. that’s not what she wanted to call you.

she couldn’t rekindle things again, could she? what if she fucked everything up again and everyone in the town found out? she rolled her eyes at the thought and tried to fix the mess she’d made of her sketch. she’d gotten your nose all wrong and it just didn’t look like you.

the thought that she was forgetting what you look like made her want to knock on your door at..3am in the morning. “damn,” ellie rubbed her eye as she realized the time. she shut her book and walked over to her bed when a quiet rapping on the door stopped her. she waited for it to continue and it did. in that familiar beat that was meant for the two of you when sneaking out to see each other was a big no-no.

ellie realizing it was you, cursed as she searched for pants to put on and a jacket to throw on. she scrambled around to get dressed before opening the door with a startled expression. "hi."

"hi." you sung, swaying from side to side like a child.

ellie tilted her head at your behavior before replying. "are you okay?"

"m'finee. why does everyone keep asking that?" you stepped forward to lean against the doorframe but you ended up leaning and missing the frame altogether.

"woah," ellie barely caught you when it hit her. you were drunk. or high off your ass. or both. either way it was concerning how you got like this and decided to come to her of all people. "you're drunk. like really drunk." her hands wrapped around your waist moved to your arms, pulling you inside before closing the door behind you. "drunk." ellie laughed in disbelief as she looked at you.

she'd wanted to see you, but this wasn't exactly the way she imagined it. regardless, she was happy to see you not so tense around her. "staring." you sang again, flopping back onto the bed.

"shit, sorry. let's get you sober." she grabbed the cup on her desk and walked to the bathroom, but not before taking a glance at you. "ish." it wasn't long before she sat next to you. "here."

you sat up and gulped down the water, something you'd probably regret later, and handed her the cup. "ah," you laid back down.

"ah-ah" ellie pulled you back up. "you are not gonna throw up on my bed. please don't do that."

you opened your mouth in offense. "I wouldn't-" you hiccuped. "do that. I wouldn't do that, el. I promise." you said as if it was the most serious thing on earth.

"i believe you." ellie couldn't help but laugh.

she let out a deep breath as she looked at you in your own world. it was good seeing you be you again. it reminded of her of the nights she'd force you into watching some shitty 80s movie for movie night and listen to you complain about it the whole time. or patrols when you'd gift her some random thing you found who knows where saying "it reminds me of you." with a horrible attempt at a wink. days when there was less to worry about.

"missed you, you know." she said quietly. "a lot actually." the confession didn't come off her chest easily but you wouldn't remember later anyway. call it a test run.

"I missed you too, e." you said so naturally she questioned the truth of it. though it seems she was given her answer when you patted around for her hand. she quickly gave it to you. "we shouldn't have broke up." you slurred.

ellie froze. "don't say that."

"why not?" you pouted, leaning your head onto your shoulder. you looked up at her with slightly glossy eyes.

"cause i'm gonna think it's true.” she disconnected her hand from yours to put her arm around your shoulder. “and you’re drunk which meant i shouldn’t take anything you say to heart.”

“that’s just mean. you should take everything i say to heart.” you nuzzled your head into her neck, making her let out a strained hum. you knew she was touch-starved and was probably doing this to tease her. goddamn you.

“that’s very credible.” she got up. “c’mon, you’re gonna sit up in bed till you fall asleep.” ellie squatted down to take off your boots and set them by the bed.

“will you lay down with me?”

her eyes flicked back up to you at the question. she shut them for a while, trying to keep her head on a straight. “you’re not laying down, remember?”

“fine. will you sit up with me?”

“in bed?”

“yup.” you popped the p like this was some casual occurrence. like the last time you’d been this close wasn’t three years ago.

“okay.” ellie said slowly.

“yay.”

“just like a kid.” ellie smiled as she pulled back the covers and patted the spot. you glared at her for the comment and she matched the energy with a smile in her eyes. “get in, kid.”

“only cause i want to.”

after you slid in, ellie did the same. she looked at the ceiling as you scooted closer to her and laid your head on her shoulder again. this time your hands snuck around her waist. “had no idea you were a cuddly drunk.” ellie smiled as you giggled.

“i’ve grown up.”

“i see.” ellie grabbed on your hands from her waist, feeling brave enough to lace your fingers together. she’d enjoy the closeness for the moment. in the morning, you’d awkwardly apologize and scamper off. probably not talk to her for a while.

“missed you.” you mumbled sleepily before closing your eyes. “missed this.”

“me too,” ellie looked at you in this relaxed state. thankful for the opportunity to see this before the morning hit. but she didn’t want to think about that now. she wanted to think of how cute you looked sleepy. how much you enjoyed her touch. how much she was enjoying your touch. “me too.” she laid her head on yours.

thank you for reading!

[smusherina]

yard work - chapter 11 (regina george x reader)

fandom: Mean Girls (all media)

pairing: Regina George x OFC/Reader

summary: You'd been in the same class as Regina George since kindergarten. You'd lived on the same street even longer. Once upon a time, when life was sandbox disputes and who got the swing first arguments, you'd even been friends. Now, in junior year of high school, you doubted she even remembered you. The same couldn't be said about you. You definitely remembered her.

chapter 1 / chapter 2 / chapter 3 / chapter 4 / chapter 5 / chapter 6 / chapter 7 / chapter 8 / chapter 9 / chapter 10 / chapter 12

Making the scrapbook was cathartic. Remembering the good times, the innocence of your childhood, was as much of a joy as it was painful. The pictures were all quite good quality since Abuela had had a film camera. Some photos had been taken with a digital camera, which had probably originally belonged to the Georges and ended up in your possession somewhere along the way.

Regina and yourself playing in the Georges' backyard and swimming in their pool, beaming smiles directed at the camera. You could almost hear the laughter. I miss when we used to be able to just have fun together like this. I guess it's a part of growing up.

Regina in a white frilly dress, carrying a small basket of flower petals, donning a crown of roses on her head. She was pouting, clearly unimpressed by the whole thing. You hadn't been at the wedding since it was a George event, but Regina's mom had been so elated her daughter had gotten to be the flower girl. I remember I was so jealous you got to go to a wedding and I couldn't. You hated it, though, which was funny. You used to leave the room whenever your mom insisted we watch the tape. I wonder if she still has it.

You sitting with Regina, hip to hip, on plastic chairs while a newlyborn Kylie slept in your laps. Regina, eyes stuck on her baby sister and a thoughtful look on her face, while you looked at the camera with a smile. She's growing up so fast. Don't think I don't know you care about her. There's gonna be a time you'll regret not spending time with her. I already feel it.

Mrs George, Abuela, Regina, Kylie in her mom's arms, and you grouped together at a parking lot. You and Regina had on little graduation gowns and had scrolls in your hands. Elementary school graduation. The summer before middle school. End of an era. I love your mom's clothes, they're so nineties. Does she still have those jeans? You should get ahold of them before somebody else does...

Remember when I sliced my hand open when we were peeling apples? That was a time for sure. I still have the scar!

You taped pictures onto the pages, wrote little things here and there, hoping the labour of your love wouldn't end up in the garbage. Or if it did, Regina would read skim through it first.

I think this album was the first time we agreed on music. Britney Spears really brought us together, huh? We even learned the choreography of Baby One More Time. Mrs George loved it. I bet there's a video of that somewhere.

Mostly the scrapbook was filled with anecdotes about your childhoods together. You did write a letter of sorts on the first page, regarding your intentions with the whole thing.

I made this for you to commemorate the good times we had. You know me regrettably well, so I think you know how I tend to hold onto things. I still have that gaudy pink Build-A-Bear you made me for Valentine's Day that one time. It's one of my most important possessions, only second to the memories we have together. You'll always be a friend to me, Reggie. If not forever, or from now on, then back then. I love you. Yours, Jorts.

You'd pretty much finished the whole thing by the end of the weekend. You spent Monday and Tuesday decorating the front cover, mostly because you purposefully put it off. You cut out letters from magazines and glued them there, painstakingly forming the words Reggie & Jorts. You'd tried to come up with something clever, but making a pun or a dumb joke felt like cheapening the whole album. A simple name made up for with fabulous decorations!

You weren't much of a painter, but you figured it'd be fitting if the album reflected its contents. It was fine if the roses you painted looked like a five-year-old did them. A good majority of the pictures featured you and Regina huddled around a crafts table, similar projects scattered all around you, young with clumsy hands but filled with artistic passion.

The album in itself was an earthy green colour, something Regina undoubtedly found ugly. The flowers brightened it up somewhat, but there was only so much ages-old acrylic paints could do. You outlined some with Sharpies. If you didn't know better, one could assume it looked like that on purpose.

You took it with you to school on Wednesday. You had it weighing your backpack down the whole day. You sweated under all your layers, and by the end of it, you were sure you were sporting some epic pit stains. Gross, but you were so nervous. You hadn't broken into anyone's locker in so long. And it was Regina George's locker.

You loitered around the hallways as they emptied out steadily, people heading home or off to extracurriculars. As you approached Regina's locker, you swallowed down your nervousness and got to work.

It wasn't hard. The combination locks were all old and weak, more of a formality than an actual barrier between one's stuff and a burglar. The lock clicked open easily and you wasted no time in stuffing your album inside.

"Hey!" Just as the resounding click of the lock going back into place came, a voice called out to you. "What are you doing with Regina's locker?"

"Uhh..." Gretchen Wieners stood at the intersection of hallways, hands on her hips and accusatory eyes burning holes in you. You made the swift decision that you did not have time for this. You booked it.

"Hey! Get back here!" Gretchen, surprisingly considering her heels, started after you. "What did you put in it? You cannot prank Regina, or- or, oh, was it a bomb?"

"It's not a bomb!" You shouted over your shoulder, sprinting towards the exit. The aggressive clacking of Gretchen's heels on the floors as she ran after you would surely haunt your nightmares. How could she even keep up with you?

"If it's not a bomb then what!" How was she closing in on you? It seemed like she was not even fazed by your little race, meanwhile, you were already winded. The exit was not that far away, but it felt like miles.

"It's Regina's business now! Ask her tomorrow at school or something!" The doors to freedom approached. "Stop chasing me!"

"Stop running!"

"No!"

You burst out and quickly hopped down the stairs, two at a time. Gretchen was still on your tail, but once she got to the top of the stairs shouted: "Karen! Tackle her!"

You hadn't even noticed Karen fucking Shetty. There was no not noticing her when the girl sprinted at you with perfect athletic form and squashed you like a linebacker.

You collided and flew into the snow. Better than the concrete of the footpath but it still hurt like a bitch.

"Get off of me!" You tried to get out from under her, but Karen was surprisingly dense. She was small but it was as if there were stones in her body instead of organs. "Fuck!"

"Keep her there, Karen, very good."

"Thanks!" Karen beamed, which was a much more common expression on her than the bloodlust she'd shown earlier.

"This has nothing to do with you." You snarled, still wriggling. "This is between Regina and me."

"Whatever's between Regina is between us," Gretchen said, all hoity-toity. "Now, tell me exactly what you put in her locker."

"A fucking photo album." You hissed, closing your eyes and clenching your jaw. What lie could you come up with? "Our families used to know each other. It's mostly pictures of her, so I just thought to... Return it."

"Oh, that's so nice!" Karen's hold loosened and you went to escape.

"Nuh-uh, not good enough." Just like that, Karen's weight slammed back down onto you. Your breath wooshed out of your lungs.

"What more do you want?" You wheezed out, getting sick and tired of this.

"Why was it in your possession?"

"I don't fucking know! It just was!"

"Hmm. And why couldn't you just give it to her?"

"You think that would've gone well, Gretchen? Seriously?" You turned your head with great effort, staring up at the girl. "Please, just let me go."

"I don't think I believe you." Gretchen squatted next to your head. "We're going back and checking it's what you say it is. And then you might be free to go."

"Fuck you." You hissed but made no move to book it when Karen hauled you up.

"That's not very nice." Karen pointed out.

"I don't want to be nice to Gretchen right now." You had no real issue with Karen, even if she had just tackled you.

"Oh, okay." You couldn't see her when she was holding your wrists behind your back, but you could imagine she was bobbing her head up and down like she was known to do.

You were walked back into the building, going mostly without a fight. Gretchen strutted along proudly as if capturing you was some great victory. Regina had trained her well. You weren't sure if that was impressive or just sad.

"Open it." Gretchen gestured once you were back at Regina's locker.

"I need my hands to do that." You helped out, smiling at Gretchen like she was stupid. Sputtering and offended, she instructed Karen to let go.

Instead of running like you should've, taking the chance you could get out if Karen didn't get a one-up on you, you obediently cracked the code again. Was it selfish that you kind of wanted others to know about you and Regina? Was it totally horrible of you to want to know it was real and have proof of that? Well, if it was, there was no helping it.

Gretchen snatched the album from the locker before you could even think to touch it. Karen sidled up to her, peering over her shoulder as she opened it.

You stood by, waiting for their judgement and looking at the ceiling. There'd been a water leak right there, based on the discolouration. Gross.

"You... You're J. J is for Jorts." Gretchen said. She sounded weird, like hollow or something. "J is for Jorts." She said again, breathy and disbelieving.

"What?" What the fuck was going on?

Karen spoke then. "She talks about J a lot. Like, a lot a lot. A whole lot." You nodded slowly as Karen went on. "J's like, her true love. It's so cute."

"J is not her true love, Karen! They are both girls." Gretchen pointed out. You had to agree. "Are they?" She looked you up and down judgementally.

"Yes. I am a girl." You said. It was true, you were female and around the age that it was acceptable to be referred to as a girl. Even so, it made you distinctly uncomfortable.

"Hmm." Gretchen didn't seem to believe you. Karen was busy cooing at the pictures of small Regina. It was sheer luck they hadn't bothered to read your writings.

"Look, can I go now? I know I'm busted, you're probably gonna confiscate the album, and Regina will never see it. Happy?"

"No. Karen, please put it back in the locker." Gretchen said, not taking her eyes off of you. Karen did as asked with a pout. "What is your relationship with Regina?" The album was back in the locker, but it hadn't been locked again.

"Nothing." And that was true. There was nothing there anymore.

"That's a lie and you know it. If you're J, then you've known each other at least since middle school. Based on the pictures, even longer."

"Who is J?" You asked in exasperation.

"Somebody who she has protected for years now. Somebody who is always better than we could ever be." Gretchen pointed between herself and Karen. "J is important to her."

"Okay, well, good for J, I guess."

"You're so infuriating." Gretchen sighed, pinching the skin between her eyes.

"You aren't the first to tell me that."

"Of course, because Regina has said that to you. Because you've known each other forever. Because you're J."

"Listen, I may look a bit butch, but I have a perfectly ordinary girl name."

"That is not the point!" She spoke fast and high-pitched. "You. It's you. You've been under our noses this entire time! Do you realize how much easier things could've been if you were around?"

"Excuse me?" Now, you were really lost.

"You're excused," Karen said cheerfully. You nodded to her in thanks.

"We could never be as good as you. It was like we were placeholders for the ultimate pretty girl she'd somehow let slip. And it's you. In a flannel and hoodie, ratty jeans, dirty shoes, no fashion sense to speak of. It's you." She said that last part with contempt.

You were reeling. Regina had talked about you to these two. Had compared them to you, cited that you were better. For years she'd done that. She'd never forgotten about you.

"Look, Gretchen, I'm sorry Regina's treated you badly." You'd lost the need to defend her, even still. Then again, even if you hadn't, there was little you could argue about with the two she'd tormented the most. "You can probably tell this is something Regina doesn't want coming out."

"What does that matter?" Gretchen asked, eyes far away and legs beginning to pace. "We could- could finally bring her down. Yes. We have J, we have everything she wants. She'll come grovelling."

You took a deep breath. You didn't feel angry, you were too tired to get angry at mean girls at this point. Besides, nobody could rile you up like Regina.

"You're wrong." You put it plainly. "What Regina's been doing to these people, to everyone around her, is wrong. But what I find despicable is how everybody is the same. I know her reasons, I can sympathise with her, but I can't say the same for you. So tell me." You paused to take a deep breath. "Why?"

"I'm not good at riddles, I'm sorry." Karen said, looking genuinely apologetic.

"It's okay, Karen, Gretchen can answer for you both."

"She deserves it." Gretchen said, steel in her tone.

"You sound just like Cady Heron and Janis 'Imi'ike. She hurt them too. What do you think ruining her life will achieve?"

"I'll be the new Regina George."

"Do you hear yourself? You still idolize her. If you're gonna be the new Regina George, it's always going to be a Regina George world. Don't you want to be Gretchen Wieners?"

"No!" She screeched. "Gretchen Wieners is lame, boring, too eager, a slut, desperate-" She took a deep breath.

"Okay." You said. "Why? Because Regina said so? Why would you believe her? She's just the same as you. Look," You pulled the album back out.

"Here we're in the Georges' pool. She would not go to the deep end. Y'know, she refused to even go in without those arm floaties for the longest time. Eventually, some boy made fun of her for them and that was the last time.

"And in this one we're driving back from summer camp. Regina was already tall enough to go without a booster seat, but I wasn't. She'd just thrown the biggest tantrum 'cause Mrs George didn't allow her to take off her seatbelt to sleep. She went out like a light, anyway.

"We're in Six Flags there. We'd just gotten those ice creams and you can see that Regina's isn't sticking to the cone all that well. Right after the shot, it just slid off. Regina was inconsolable. I offered her mine so we could share, and that seemed to be good enough for her but her dad was not having it. He threatened to take us home if she didn't stop crying right then, that it'd be all her fault that their whole family wasted money and time on this stupid trip. Eventually she calmed down and Mr George didn't have to drive us back."

You sighed. "I already tried this with Janis, in a way. I don't think Regina would appreciate me airing out her personal life like this, but... I don't know..." You closed your eyes for a moment. "I just want people to stop making things worse for her. She's been so wrong for so long, and I know I can't keep defending her, but I just don't think revenge will make her regret anything that she's done."

Karen hummed. "My auntie's been teaching me about karma. So, like, if she feels what she's made others feel, then won't that like... Fix her?"

"I don't want to hurt her." You said, resolute. "Maybe, it could be the most effective way to make her see her shortcomings. But I don't want to. I do not want to hurt her." You looked between the two. "And that's where we differ, I guess."

Gretchen didn't say anything, eyes glued to a picture from the Six Flags trip. Regina had mustard and ketchup smeared all over her face while she was holding a napkin to your lips, in the process of wiping your face.

With that, you snatched the album from her hands, deposited it back into the locker and slammed it shut. The lock clicked. Without a word, you began to talk towards the exit. Neither of them followed you or said anything to you.

You couldn't stop people from taking their revenge. You had done your best to be diplomatic. Evoking sympathy in hormonal teenagers wasn't something easily done, or maybe you were just shitty at it, but there was little else you could do. If you went ahead and retaliated, hurt them for hurting someone you cared about, the lines blurred.

You'd just be another mean girl.

Notes: Sorry for the delay! The next chapter will be the last one, unless I start rambling or something. After that, I'll do a less structured series of epilogues. Loosely related oneshots, that kinda vibe.

Also, my writing assistant stopped working in the middle of this, so if there's stupid typos I'll come fix them later.

I swear to fucking god if the taglist doesn't work I'll start breaking bones.

Taglist: @autorasexy, @wedfan2, @unadulterated-moron, @modernsapphicism , @9unknown0 , @sage-rose2000 , @massive-honkas , @nattys-swiftie , @likefirenrain , @luz-enjoyer , @dandelions4us , @natashamaximoff-69 , @alexkolax , @jareaul0ver , @here4theqts , @charleeeesworld , @natsbiggestfan1 , @brocoliisscared , @yellowwallflowers , @scarlettbitchx , @ayoungexwife , @cyberbonesworld , @syddie-reads , @screechcat , @theenglishswiftie , @gabby-duhh , @sweetmissnothing , @masterofpuppets-10 , @l1lass , @starved-mortal , @nothanksbye07 , @nenas19 , @jvuyii , @starry-night17 , @reneeswife24 , @glorioushamsterqueen , @krononan , @slug-on-bike , @rayisaknight , @chaseatlanticlover91 , @reginassweetheart , @mirage018

(this actually makes me angry. why. why doesnt it work. i type in the @ and then i type in the name and then it shows up in the lil' box and i click it but then it don't show up ;-;)

(this is cyber bullying. the cybers are bullying me.)

(anyway, if you want to be added to the taglist there is no gurantee if it'll work, but i'll add you if you want! just comment on this post :) if anybody has any ideas why it's like this, lmk!)

[aezuria]

hiii i love ur writing sm!! i was wondering if u would do leo valdez x reader headcanons? ty!!!

*ੈ✎ keep your head still, i'll be your thrill

—all the small things, blink-182

content: leo valdez x reader

warnings: cursing again

librarian's annotations: the title has no connection to the hcs but it came up while i was writing this also IM SO SORRY THIS TOOK FOREVER 🙏🙏🙏

super clingy i do not make the rules

oh you thought you were gonna get up and be productive?? not today!

fuck everyone else tbh

LOVEEES gossip sessions with u

hes so invested in all the drama u have

probably laying on his stomach and swinging his feet and gasping incredulously. "what!? no she did not..."

got very pouty that you did not invite him to the girls night bc he didnt want to "miss out on the tea" (lwk stealing from my own work oops)

who can blame him tbh

LOVE LOVES DANCING

loves teaching u too (even if u suck)

like imagine him holding your waist and moving you to the beat as you fumble along, his chest pressed up against your own

GOOD LORD

"forward, back, left- there you go," he murmured into your ear, looking down at your feet. you stepped on his shoes a lot more than you should've; did he ever think that his proximity was why you were messing up!?

"you suck at this, don't you?" he laughed, but twirled you around anyway.

"did you ever think you're just a shit teacher?"

"rude!"

also this man was born a star

can probably hit super high notes as if its nothing

ok so we all know how hes a genius right

oh my GOD imagine him explaining how his stuff works and using words you're sure don't even exist and he's so into it and he just sounds so SMART

intelligence is so attractive why does no one talk abt that

you wanted to watch him work on the engine, so you pulled up a stool next to him. you stared at his side, his tank top dirty with grease and sticky with sweat. how long had he been working since you got here?

you'd get mad at him for not taking a break later. right now? you were admiring the view. who wouldn't?

"hey leo?"

he hummed in response, still hyper-focused on the engine.

"how does all that work, exactly?" you were never one for machines—good thing you have a mechanic boyfriend!

he looks to you, a happy glimmer in his eyes. "you really wanna know? so basically— this part connects to that part and then..."

you don't know how long you've been zoned out, too busy staring at his perfect

"y/n?" he finally realizes you haven't been paying attention. "you with me, now?" he raises an eyebrow with a grin on his face.

"huh? what?" you straightened up, fumbling over your words. "yeah! why wouldn't i be?" you tried to act as if you weren't just ogling him seconds before.

"oh y'know.. cause you were checking me out." he winked, leaning back against the engine as he put himself on display. "i mean, you obviously couldn't help it. i mean, look at me!"

someone humble him

its not like he doesn't do the same tho

if he accidentally walks in on you he'd be like "oh my gods-! sorry!" and cover his eyes with his hands, but his fingers are parted so he could still look through. literally the 🫣 emoji

"GET OUT!"

"OKAY I'M GOING DON'T HIT ME- OW!"

he is SUPER ticklish and you WILL use this to your advantage

esp his ears

one time you touched them out of curiosity cause theyre pointer than average and he was like "eek!"

pause

"aww i didn't know you could make that sound!" you poked some more fun at him because that was adorable

"shut up!"

another time he's laying on you, ruining your plans of getting up early and being active. you tried rolling out from underneath him but his arms snake around you like a vice, squeezing a groan out of you.

"leo get off!" you tried shoving him off, but that didn't work either. he simply buried his face into your neck, mumbling a tired no.

you really had shit to do, so you resorted to the last possible tactic. "i didn't wanna have to do this..." you warned. (you so wanted to do this)

you slipped your hands under his shirt and started tickling his stomach, effectively getting him writhing off you with laughter.

"stop-! that tickles!" he tried doing the same back, but he was squirming far too much.

ok real talk now

love loves staying up late with you until its past midnight and you guys are just rambling about random topics. he's just so relaxed with you, his heart feels so full and there's no space anymore, so his bottled up emotions spill out

which is usually a closely-guarded secret because he's just the funny guy of the group, right?

what does he know about feelings? isn't it his job to just keep everyone else happy? joking about everything will take away the pain, won't it?

(it doesn't)

"i don't know, i just- feel like i don't really fit in with everyone. they all have these cool powers, and i'm just.. me." he laughed dryly, face devoid of his usual happiness as he stared at the ceiling. "sometimes, i feel like you could do so much better. but at the same time?" his voice lowered as he rolled onto his side, staring into your eyes. "i want to keep you to myself. i really, really don't want to lose you."

you were glad he finally opened up to you, but your heart ached at the way he thought of himself. how could he not see how highly everyone thought of him, especially you?

"just you? leo, you're the coolest person i know. you're so, so smart, you can fix just about anything, you're funny, you're kind, you can cook; what's not to love?" you smiled softly. you could go on and on about this man. for him to think that he was the lucky one? it was quite the opposite.

"and you don't have to worry," you whispered, cuddling closer to him and pressing a soft kiss to his cheek. "i'll always be with you."

[authorhjk1]

First of all, Happy New Year!

Second, holy fuck, Midnight..the idea of ending and starting a year with fucking arguably the 3 best milkers is just wild, and while a small part of me wishes you could've explore more into the foursome action and some gxg between them as well, overall it was still smoking hot, considering the timing as well releasing this right at the end of the year with the theme of fucking them 3 to end the year is quite a nice touch honestly..and that Karina sequence especially was so fucking amazing,really,thank you for such an amazing fic to close 2023 and welcome 2024..

Last but not least, looking forward for your next works too, but do take your time and no need to rush things,good luck too for all the things you do in life and i'll patiently wait for you to drop the next one whenever you have the time too,best of luck and take care!

Happy new year to you as well!

Hope you like this small scene:

You watch as Jihyo takes the condom out of your hand. Getting distracted for a moment by Karina's lips, which wrap around the tip of your cock, you almost miss out on the sight in front of you.

Standing in the door to the bathroom, you can see Jihyo walking into the shower. Eunbi is inside, sitting in a pool of warm water and her own juices. And probably Karina's as well. Her eyes are only half open, her wet hair sticking to her face, shoulders and the tiles of the wall behind her.

Too tired to react, Eunbi feels how Jihyo pulls at her jaw, forcing her mouth to open. Tilting the condom in her hand, she let's your cum fall onto the breathless Eunbi. A small puddle of cum lands on her lips and mouth, before Jihyo cheekily, changes the angle. The rest of your sperm lands on the older girl's tits.

"Oops. My bad."

Jihyo coos as she chuckles, Eunbi too drained to defend herself.

A groan escapes your lift as Karina keeps sucking you off. Her hand holds onto your base, slowly stroking it, while her lips run along your length.

By the way her eyes are closed, you can tell how much she enjoys the taste of Eunbi's slick on your cock.

"Are you getting him hard enough for me? That's so sweet of you."

Jihyo is standing behind the youngest, who's eyes are now open in surprise and anger.

"(Y/n) just wrecked your pussy again. It's my turn, greedy slut."

Karina pouts as you glance at the window. It used to be completely fogged, due to the steam of the hot water coming from the shower. But Karina's face, which is completely wet by now, cleaned the window nicely. You pressed her against it as you took her from behind. The puddle of her cum is still staining the floor and parts of the windowsill.

Jihyo pulls at Karina's hair, making the younger hiss in pain as she gets forced off your cock.

"You better fuck me good, baby boy."

Jihyo takes you hand and walks out of the bathroom, just like Karina did a few hours ago.

Jihyo's tits feel like heaven. They are tightly wrapped around your cock as she kneels in front of you, while you lie on the bed. Her soft mounds move up and down, sandwiching your cock in between.

Karina is lying next to you, Eunbi's head buried between her thighs. The youngest moans as the oldest fucks her pussy with her tongue. Eunbi was shy about it at first, but is now getting into it. Karina's hands try to hold onto something, until they find your body. Her nails dig painfully into the skin on your arm and chest.

"Are you gonna shoot your load all over mommy's tits, baby?"

You are barely able to nod. Jihyo has a good eye, you are already close.

She spits into her cleavage, enabling her to move up and down your length even faster.

"Good boys always cum on their mommy's boobs."

Jihyo's eyes are fixated on yours as she tries to predict the exact moment in which you're gonna cum.

Next to you, Karina's moans have reached another high and so does her body. Her thighs trap Eunbi's head in place as she cums on the older girl's face.

"Unnie!"

Her sweet voice makes the word sound lewd and erotic.

It slowly pushes you over the edge as well.

"Cum for us. Jizz all over my tits."

You finally follow Jihyo's order.

You start exploding, your load coating her chest with your cum. She moans in satisfaction, feeling the warm liquid on her skin.

"That's a good boy."

She sighs, letting your cock fall out of the space between her tits.

Eunbi was able to force her head out of Karina's pussy by now. She is now straddling you, impaling herself on your cock. The sudden penetration makes you groan.

"Please breed me, baby."

She moans loudly.

"Can you get me pregnant?"

That whispered question makes you hard immediately. You are suddenly aware that Eunbi is riding you. Raw.

_____

Thank you for always reading my stuff, I will make sure to keep writing as soon as possible.

Stay healthy!

[bucky-fricking-barnes]

Resolutions

Title: Resolutions

Pairing: Steve Rogers x Reader

Word Count: 2.3k

Warnings: Fluff, Kissing

Summary: Steve and Y/N recover from their night out for New Year’s Eve.

A/N: Happy New Year! Here’s some short fluff to kick off 2024, just in case you already need it. Thank you for supporting me all of 2023. I’m excited to see what this year brings!

Dividers by @firefly-graphics

The soreness and stiffness of your muscles is the first thing you notice as you blink awake. The second is that Steve is no longer in bed. Slowly, you sit up and groan as you do. You grab the blankets from the inside and pull them with you, doing your best to stay covered by their warmth as you peer around the room and search for him.

You clear your throat, then call, “Steve?”

A moment later, he appears in your doorway, already dressed in his running gear. Steve smiles once he sees you staring blearily at him from under the covers.

“How’d you sleep?” he asks.

You sigh and snuggle back down in bed now that you know he’s okay. “Good. What time is it? Are you really going to run? We were up all night.” Yawning, you pull the blankets as far up to your chin as you can, and Steve laughs in response.

He closes the distance between himself and the bed, then sits beside your legs. You turn on your side and shift slightly towards the center of the bed to make more room for him. From under the covers, you reach out a hand, and he takes it. Steve’s fingers are warm, which more than makes up for the blankets you almost immediately miss once you stick your hand out. The room is far too cold for your liking.

“I promised Tony that I’d run with him,” he replies. “New Year’s resolutions and all that.”

You hum and close your eyes, enjoying the heat that radiates from Steve’s body and warms up your legs.

“Y/N?” he asks.

You peek open an eye.

“Are you going to fall asleep again?”

Grinning, you let go of his hand and stretch underneath the blankets, reveling in the way your muscles lengthen, then relax. After the long night of standing, walking, and dancing that you’d had the night before, it feels sublime. You let out a groan as you relax back against the mattress.

“No,” you reply. You flip onto your back, watching Steve as he bends over to adjust the laces on his shoes. “How long do you think you’ll be gone?” 

He sits back up. “Maybe an hour or so. I’m not sure how long Tony’s going to want to run.”

“Has he ever been running with you before?” you ask, tsking when Steve shakes his head. “That’ll be fun, I’m sure. He’s probably just gonna end up mad at you.”

Steve laughs and shifts so he’s facing you more than before. “That’s what I told him. You gonna be up by the time I get back?”

You grin and he laughs again, knowing that you’re likely to stay in bed as long as you can. It’s not often that you have the day off work and have no appointments or errands to run.

Leaning down, Steve presses a kiss to your cheek. You tilt your head to the side and close your eyes when he does, reveling in the sweet gesture. As he pulls away, you open your eyes again and watch as he gets up to go.

“Run fast! Faster than Tony!” you call after him, and Steve shouts something you can’t quite make out in response. It makes you smile nonetheless, and you snuggle back under the covers once more, ready to doze until he returns.

When you finally do get out of bed an hour and a half later, Steve still isn’t back from his run. You don’t worry, but you do shoot him a text that you’ll know he’ll see on his watch, no matter how fast he’s running. He’s set up a special vibration pattern for the alerts when you text or call so that he always knows when it’s you.

FRIDAY picks out an upbeat, motivation-boosting playlist when you ask, and you get ready as you sing along to some of the high-tempo songs she’s gathered from your music library. You stretch, pop a pain pill to help with your sore muscles, and pull on your comfiest house clothes before you brush your teeth and wash your face. You’re just starting to make breakfast when the front door opens and FRIDAY alerts you to Steve’s arrival.

“Hey!” you call out, leaning back from the stove so you can peer at him past the fridge.

Steve’s kicking off his shoes at the front door. He’s drenched in sweat and is moving stiffly, and you have to suppress a wince. You know that whatever effects he’s feeling from the long run, Tony’s probably feeling them tenfold.

“How’d it go?” you ask.

He looks up and meets your eyes, and this time you let yourself wince so that he can see you’ve noticed the weary look on his face.

“That bad, huh?”

“It wasn’t bad,” Steve finally answers, panting slightly. He tilts his head back, then lifts his water bottle and shakes the last few drops into his open mouth. “Just long. I didn’t stretch as much as I should’ve, either.”

“Well, you haven’t run since before Christmas. Most people probably feel the same way you do today, too,” you say.

You flip the last protein pancake you’ve made for him, then go back to chopping up the fruit. Steve pads across the living room and into the kitchen. He immediately discards his water bottle into the sink and pulls a glass from the cabinet.

“There’s juice in the fridge,” you tell him, not glancing up from your work. “Or I can make coffee, if you want.”

“I just need water,” he replies. 

Steve fills up his glass three times from the water dispenser built into the Stark Industries mega fridge. You’re thankful that Tony had it built into your apartment. Otherwise, you’d have to go grocery shopping three or four times a week just to make sure that both you and Steve are well-fed. Between his high metabolism, the extra food he needs after his long workouts, and your own meals, you’re certain that the two of you go through several hundred dollars worth of groceries a week.

“Breakfast should be done once you’re out of the shower,” you say.

You look over at Steve then, and he nods as he finishes swallowing the water and sets the empty glass down on the counter. He leaves you to go shower then, and you finish cooking as you listen to the shower start.

Steve sings while he showers. It makes you smile, just like it always does, as you set the table and open the blinds, peering out at the city. The snow from Christmas Day has almost melted, and the cleanup from last night’s festivities is almost over. You’ve lived in the city for years and it still amazes you how quickly Times Square gets cleaned up, then the streets that surround it.

“What are you looking at?”

You turn to find Steve standing in the doorway to the kitchen, drying his hair with a towel. You hadn’t heard him stop singing, nor had you heard him finish up in the shower. He must’ve been quick today.

“Just amazed at how quickly everything got cleaned up, is all,” you say, moving away from the window. “The street was a mess when we got home.”

Steve chuckles and drapes the towel over the back of one of the wooden chairs at the table. “Well, Tony did host his own party last night, in addition to the one in the Square,” he replies.

You grin, remembering how you’d snuck out of Tony’s over-the-top party to take Steve to see the ball drop. Given that it was your first New Year’s Eve together, you’d wanted it to be special, and he’d confided just before Christmas that he’d never seen the ball drop. He’d never managed to see it in person before he went into the ice, and once he was back, he’d been too overwhelmed to bother watching it on TV. You’d held his hand the whole time, and once you’d gotten to the VIP spot you’d managed to reserve after some serious name-dropping, you’d stood in front of him so he could wrap his arms around you to keep you warm.

Steve had been amazed by all the technology involved in the performances and the actual ball drop itself. He’d asked a billion questions during the show, enough that you’d spent more time explaining who Miley Cyrus was than you did actually watching her set. You didn’t mind, though. You’d answer Steve’s questions for a thousand years if it meant spending time together.

“Which one was your favorite?” you ask as you pull out your chair to sit at the table. Steve does the same.

“As much as I liked the one here, I liked the one in the Square.”

You heap pancakes onto both of your plates. Once you do, Steve starts dishing out toppings.

“Yeah?”

“I got to be closer to you.”

Heat flames in your cheeks and you mutter something about liking the same thing as you dig into your food. You know that Steve is smiling to himself as he starts to eat too—he always grins like a little boy who’s just kissed a girl for the first time whenever he successfully flusters you. It’s endearing.

The two of you eat, talking about the parties and his morning run in between bites, and Steve cleans up while you queue up the most recent episode of your show. Once the last dish is on the drying rack, he takes up his normal spot beside you on the couch. He drapes his arm behind your shoulders and stretches his legs out in front of him as you press play and set aside the remote. You pull a blanket over your laps, the massive fluffy one that Clint had bought you for Christmas.

Halfway through the episode, Steve looks over at you and asks, “What’s your New Year’s resolution?”

You glance in his direction, then scoot closer so you can cuddle against him. “I don’t know. I don’t think I really have one this year. After everything that’s happened, I guess my goal is to have a calm year, but that’s not really something I can control, you know?”

He hums in acknowledgement and shifts his arm so his hand is resting on your shoulder. His thumb rubs a steady back and forth movement as you continue to watch the show, but after a few minutes you tilt your head back to look up at him.

“Do you have one? A resolution?”

“I do,” Steve says. He looks away from the screen to meet your eyes, and he smiles a little. “Maybe it’s a little old-fashioned, though. Tony said it was, at least.”

“Oh yeah? What is it?”

“I want to spend more time with you. And when I’m with you,” he adds, “I want to be fully focused on you, not thinking about whatever mission they might send us on next or whatever’s happening halfway across the world.”

Smiling wide, you reach up with one hand to touch your fingertips over Steve’s cheek, turning his face more towards you, and then you pull him down for a kiss. His free hand moves to cradle your face as his lips move against yours. 

“That has to be the sweetest, most romantic New Year’s resolution I’ve ever heard,” you murmur.

Steve chuckles. His breath is warm as it fans across your face. “Yeah?”

“Did you practice that this morning with Tony?”

He bursts into laughter and pulls away. You’re grinning and watching him as he tries not to seem flustered by your seemingly innocuous question, and you have to force yourself to hold in your own laughter so you can pretend to be serious about it.

“I’m just saying, he’s more of a ladies man than you,” you continue, “so it only makes logical sense that you’d try to convince him to teach you some moves!”

“Teach me some moves?” Steve repeats, smiling wide. He shifts from his spot on the couch, easily moving until he’s stretched out across it and you’re on your back underneath him. The blanket falls to the floor and one of his legs is braced on top of it, because you haven’t been able to order a couch that’s wide enough for him to lay on comfortably. 

“Yeah, you know. Flirting! Did you forget what that is?”

He rolls his eyes and leans down to kiss you, but it’s sweet and cut short because you’re both smiling too much. You give in to the laughter. He rolls his eyes, though he still smiles even as you throw your head back, your whole body shaking.

Steve presses another chaste kiss to your lips when you calm down enough to breathe properly. “Do you really think I need help flirting with you?” he teases.

You shake your head and pull him down to lay on top of you, then wrap your arms around him. One hand goes to play with the hair on the back of his head while the other rubs up and down his spine, and you feel him practically melt against you a few moments later.

Smiling to yourself, you answer, “You know I don’t, lover boy.”

He falls asleep sometime during the next episode, but you don’t mind. You turn your head to watch the show as you continue to rub Steve’s back, and every once and a while you close your eyes just to soak in the moment. It’s the perfect, most peaceful start to the new year. You want to relish every second of it.

Thank you for reading! If you liked this, please consider reblogging my work so that others can enjoy it too.

I do not consent to have my work posted, translated, or published to any third party site or app. If anyone sees my work anywhere other than my personal tumblr, Patreon, or ao3 accounts, it has been reposted without my permission.

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Forever: @aya-fay

Steve Rogers: @lipstickandvibranium​ @delicatecapnerd

[impala-dreamer]

Meet Me At The Beach

A Supernatural Story

~ Texting and emails can feel so impersonal. There's nothing quite like exchanging tangible, handwritten letters with someone you love...~

Dean Winchester x F!Reader, Sam Winchester

4,025 Words

Warnings: Bittersweet Angst. SFW. 

A/N: This is for @jacklesversebingo "Writing Letters To Each Other" was the prompt. I hope you enjoy...

June 2

Dear Dean, 

This feels so weird. Do people really write letters anymore? Am I going to get strange looks at the post office when I go to buy a stamp? Will they even know what to do with this tiny envelope and folded piece of loose-leaf paper? I almost don’t know how to write anymore. My script looks kinda like chicken scratch, huh? Hopefully it’ll get better. It is weird not typing though. But emails just seem like work. Impersonal, ya know? Besides, it gives us something to look forward to when we hit the mailbox. Nice to open something that’s not a delinquent credit card bill, huh? 

Speaking of which- how the fuck do you do it? I just got another card canceled. My credit is non-existent. Fuck, I need to get a job. Could you imagine me in an office? High heels and panty hose and my hair tucked into a neat, matronly bun? I shudder to think! 

OK, this is weird. I just wanted to write “LOL” but it’s not an email. Or a text. Why are we doing this again? Oh, yeah, see above. 

Anyhoo- - - - I don’t even know what to say! Umm… I’m in New Orleans for a bit. Not working, just hanging out. My friend Emily from high school tracked me down online and we’ve been chatty. She’s in a band. They’re not bad. Not great, but not bad. So yeah, I took a drive down to see a show and I’m just lingering. Drinking too much, sleeping past noon. It’s fun. Nice little vacation. 

Which - ahem - you should be taking. When are you gonna get your ass out of that dusty old bunker and stick your toes in the sand? I already told you I’d meet you in Pensacola with sunscreen and a cooler of beer. You know you want to. Or are you just scared to show off your ugly toes in flip flops? Your boots might actually cry if you ever took them off, so I guess it’s just as well. 

Hey, do you remember that night in Richmond when it started pouring and your boots sank into the mud puddle? God, that was a mess. We were soaked to the bone. Nice way to warm up, though - cuddled in the back of the Impala. I miss that car. Sometimes, I think I can hear it at night when the world is quiet and the wind is still. It’s like the engine roars in the back of my mind and I start thinking about all our adventures, all the time we spent driving into the sunset. 

I miss you. Is that wrong? I probably shouldn’t. Or at least, I shouldn’t tell you that I do. But I do. I miss you so bad sometimes that it hurts. Like someone has punched me right in the chest. Maybe we can end up in the same town soon. Grab some tacos and sit on the hood. Make a mess. I’d like that. 

OK, before I get too emotional and start asking you to run away with me, I think I’ll end this ranting scribble of horrid handwriting. 

Write me back soon.

Love, Y/N

June 21 

Y/N- 

Your handwriting does not look like chicken scratch. I like it. Mine is like some toddler just learning his letters. Whatever. I never learned that fancy shit. I can sign my name and make a grocery list. That’s all I need. 

This is weird, yeah. But it’s kinda nice. Feels more… like you’re here. Does that make sense? Like seeing your handwriting, the dents in the paper- I don’t know. Just feels more real. Like you’re not just some computer talking back at me. Also there’s something strange about answering questions weeks later. I meant to write this sooner, but I got a little distracted. There was a Kung Fu marathon on and I just lost track of time. Too much pizza, not enough Carradine. Ya know? You know. 

Remember that horrible motel in Raleigh when we both caught that nasty stomach bug and stayed up all night watching old tv shows? Saltines and Little House. I’ll never forget it. You were so sick that day. Shit, I was sure I was gonna end up taking you to the hospital. Sure, I was puking too, but you looked like death. I hated that. Hated that I couldn’t help you, make you feel better. I did cook up a mean chicken noodle soup though, didn’t I? Not that it stayed down for long. 

Thank god for that yellow Gatorade. And yes- it’s fucking yellow. Not green. 

Anyway- I miss you too. I try not to, I really do. Not all the time, no offense, but sometimes I’m just fucking insane with shit going on. But at night, especially, I miss having you beside me. I miss rolling over and seeing you there, or hearing you snore. I miss feeling your freezing feet under the blanket. I don’t know, I just- 

What can I say? I’m sorry. I’m an asshole. I’m the biggest piece of shit in the universe. I shouldn’t have pushed you away. 

Can’t change the past. Just gotta move on. 

Maybe someday you’ll forgive me. I hope so anyway. 

I’m sorry. I shouldn’t dump that all out in a letter. I almost ripped this all up and started over. I actually let it sit for a day before I came back to it. But, fuck it- we said we were gonna write to each other and be honest, and here I am, being honest. 

Fuck, I’m so tired. That kinda tired when sleeping for ten days wouldn’t even put a dent in it. Yeah, OK, so things are getting a little better. Chuck’s gone for good this time. Jack’s got things back in place, even made a few improvements. Sam’s- well, he’s Sam. He’s fine, doing his thing. The dog is- did I tell you we have a dog now? Yeah, I know. Me and a dog- yeah right. But we do. Miracle. He’s a good boy. I’ll send you a picture soon. 

Never thought I could slow down like this. Feels like for the first time we can just - work. I mean, I’m never gonna give up hunting, not totally, but- feels like I could just ease back a bit. Been looking at some jobs in town- nothing crazy, fixing engines and stuff like that. Don’t know if you remember, but I’m pretty good with my hands. 

Did you blush? 

You did. 

OK. I guess- that’s it for now. I have no fucking idea how to end this so - bye?

~ Dean

P.S.  I’ll meet you at the beach soon. I promise.

Fifteenth of July 

To Whom It May Concern:

Re: Beach Vacation

Dear Mr. Winchester, 

I am very pleased to hear that you are agreeable to meeting me at the beach. It should be delightful fun to run through the surf and hunt for sea glass with you.

Oh shit! Do you remember that new age shop in… where the fuck was that? With the sea glass necklaces in the window that I said were so pretty and the witch inside said they were blessed to give the wearer riches or some shit like that. Where was that? Who knows.

Feels like we’ve been all over the world together. Well, this country at least. Lord knows I could never get you on an airplane. If only you could drive to Paris. Did I ever tell you about my trip to France? God, it was beautiful. Rained the whole time, but it was this beautiful, warm spring rain that made everything smell like dust and petals. Not rose petals, but those little white ones that grow on trees, ya know? It was so beautiful. Fuck it. I’m taking you one day. You need to see more than the dash of your car and the backroads of America. Time to travel!

Speaking of- I’m glad you’re slowing down a bit. I know that won’t be easy for you but if you think about it, you’ve spent the last forty years running from problem to problem like a damned bomb-sniffing dog. 

A DOG?! Dean Winchester, I never thought the day would come. I can’t wait to see a picture. Don’t forget it next time. 

I think you’d be a great mechanic. It was always very hot seeing you covered in sweat and grease especially if you had those damned coveralls on. I mean… what? I don’t think about you like that anymore, you know. It’s over and done with and we’re just friends. We are friends, aren’t we? Maybe something more than friends, I guess. Ex lovers? Ew. I hate that word. Lovers. So gross. Well, then what are we? Just two souls swimming in a fish bowl…

Year after year. Day after day. Do you know that I put nearly a hundred thousand miles on my poor truck this year? Back and forth, up and down the country. I don’t have to tell you how exhausting it is. Fun, but exhausting. Rewarding, but not. I wonder how many people remember me after I leave? Does that family in New Haven think about me whenever they go into the basement and it’s no longer haunted? Is there a photo of me on a fridge in Wilmington where I saved that guy’s fiance from the vamp nest? Probably not. I’m sure people remember you - The Great Dean Winchester. The sexy hunter with the green eyes and the giant black car. You’re hard to forget. Also, you hang out with a giant. Tell Sam I said hi. 

I do remember that puke fest! And it’s green. It’s literally neon green. Fight me. 

We could probably write a book, you and me. ‘Winchester & Y/L/N Do America’. It’s a coffee table book with pictures of random diner signs and gas station bathrooms. Maybe a list of the country’s best french fry places. Shit like that. Let’s do it. I’ll call my literary agent in the morning. Ha!

SPARTA!! That’s where that damned sea glass shop was. It just hit me! Stupid brain. I swear, I’ve been hit in the head way too many times. Broken too many bones. I’m getting too old for this shit. Did you know that my left knee pops whenever I stand up now? Like, how old am I?? I can’t stand it. I need a month at a spa somewhere in the desert. That’d be nice. 

Damnit. I just got a call from Vinnie Alverez. Do you know him? Hunter out of Pittsburg. Anyway- he needs help on a job. Guess I’ll cut this letter short. Hopefully I’ll find a box to drop this in on the way to PA! 

Miss you. 

Sincerely yours, 

Y/N

P.S. - I do forgive you, Dean. Of course I do. Things were just too hard back then. Life didn’t want to cooperate for us. It’s not your fault. Not my fault. It just was. Please don’t carry that guilt in your heart. You deserve better than that. 

August 2

Dear Y/N- 

You’re a real character, you know that? Love the corporate letter. I’m in for the book by the way. Could be awesome. We do need a full chapter on onion rings though. Make a note. 

I heard about your hunt in Pittsburgh. Came through the grapevine that you kicked some serious wolf ass. Nice job, kid. Hope you’re being careful. I know how bullheaded and impulsive you can get when you’re in the zone. Just watch your back, OK? Promise me. Last thing I wanna hear is that you got your heart clawed out or you’re walking around with a demon in your ass. 

Demons. Haven’t seen so many running around lately. Queen Rowena’s been keeping them in check. So fucking weird that she’s in charge now. Not that I’m surprised- she’s a badass bitch. If I had a nickel for every ruler of hell I was friends with, I’d have two nickels. Which isn’t a lot, but it’s weird that it happened twice. The kids still say that, don’t they? See, I’m not old. I keep up with pop culture and shit. Started watching the tik toks. I still don’t get it, but I like the woodturning stuff. Thinking about taking up whittling. Maybe carve you a keychain so you stop losing them. 

I got a call for a job interview. Chickened out though. I don’t know if I’m ready to start all that, ya know? Start a real life in the real world- just seems- I don’t know, scary. Yeah, I’ve faced every deadly thing on this and other worlds but the idea of getting a 9 to 5 civilian job scares me. I’m some kinda fucked up, huh? 

I think about it a lot though. Getting a job, finding a little house somewhere, settling down. A little fenced in yard so Miracle can run around and dig up dirt. Might put a rocking chair on the porch and watch the clouds, some shit like that. Would you come visit me in my Barbie dream house? I’ll cook you breakfast every morning and you can rub my feet at night. Real cozy couple stuff. 

OK, so maybe I’m thinking about you more and more these days. Maybe I’m regretting leaving. Maybe I’m just an idiot daydreaming about meeting you somewhere in the middle and sweeping you off your feet. One of those running hugs that hurts when you collide but ends in a kiss that makes everything feel better. I’m a real romantic fuck, huh? I was digging through my drawers yesterday and I found a pair of your socks. Those tiny ones that barely covered your ankle. I don’t know why they were stuffed in the back of the dresser, but there they were. Dingy white socks with the pink threads on the toes. I’ll bring them to the beach when we meet up. 

Oh, Sam says hi and he hopes you’re good and he wants you to shoot him a text when you can. You can do what you want, but you better not mail him a letter. That’s just for me. God, my hand is cramping up. I’m not used to this. Oh, and you’re not alone. My knee creaks like a haunted house when I go up stairs now. And my right wrist pops, and my neck makes this weird almost squeaking sound, and my ass- well, I could go on, but just know you’re not alone. Kinda weird to think that we lived long enough to be this old, ain’t it? I never thought I’d live to be thirty and here I am staring down 42. Forty Fucking Two. Can you believe that shit? Goddamnit I got old. Let’s go find a nursing home together. Maybe we can get a double room- or a king sized bed?

Think about it. We could be cranky old people together. Losing our memories and shuffling around with walkers and shit. You’d look cute with white hair. And fuck, my beard’s already going gray. Should I grow out my beard? 

Write back soon. I really like seeing your letters in the box. 

Dean  x

My dearest Dean Winchester, it is with great happiness that I write this letter to you and I do hope that it finds you well and happy and all good things and I can’t keep this formal shit up. Ha!

Anyway- but yeah, things are good. I know it’s been a while since I’ve written, but I was on a little trip around the continent. Headed up to Montreal for a bit. Killed some nasties, salted some bones, generally fucked around. My beloved truck crapped out in Burlington, Vermont, so I had to hang out there for a while and gather my resources to get a new vehicle. I think you’d like her. Green Ford Explorer from ‘94. OK, she’s not as sexy as the Impala, but she gets me where I need to go. Which, apparently, was Maine! I met up with some friends in Greenville. Cute little town full of witchcraft. So much fun. Also had a lobster roll on a pier… I swear to god, they plucked this thing right out of the water and slapped it on a buttered roll. You’d LOVE it. I’m gonna take you there someday. 

Speaking of- We need to make plans for Florida. I picked up a little bikini on my travels and I think I really need to show it off. Maybe you could be my bodyguard and keep the creeps away while I’m sunbathing? To repay you for your services, I’ll gladly let you take it off me at night…

Oh, and I’ve thought about this extensively, and I believe that you should, in fact, grow your beard out. Like, full on, bushy lumberjack beard. I can’t wait to see all that gray. You know I have a thing for older men… and you’ll always be older than me, Dean Winchester and don’t you forget it!

And for your information, I don’t lose my keys anymore! I got one of those… apple taggy things. Now I know where they are at all times. Can’t find my phone to find them sometimes, but that’s another issue. 

Two weeks later, I’m picking up my pen again. Sorry this is taking forever. Things are stupid busy. I wish I could just… put this fucking gun down and go live with you on a farm somewhere. Not a working farm, we wouldn’t keep pigs or anything because gross, but a farmhouse in the middle of nowhere. Big white house with a giant tree in the yard and a tire swing and a picket fence and a kid chasing the dog around and - 

Shit. Do you ever think about it? I do. A lot. More than I’d like to and it fucking cuts me up inside every time. I know we could never have kept it, and life- I mean- it just wasn’t meant to be. But I do think about it sometimes. Imagine if we’d just walked away from the life and tried to be a family? Impossible, I know. Maybe in another life. 

Shit, I’m sorry. Fuck. Ignore me. I haven’t slept in a while and I just

I want to see you. Can we meet somewhere? Wherever you want. I’ll come to you. 

~ Y/N 

Dear Dean, 

This is my second attempt at writing this. Crumpled up the first one because I’m an idiot. Am I an idiot? Did I piss you off with the last letter? I honestly didn’t mean to. I just- we said we’d be honest, and you’ve been so open in your letters that I thought it was ok to talk about, but I guess not. I’m so sorry. I shouldn’t have dug that stuff up. 

I’m so tired and stressed and I miss you so much. Since we’ve been writing back and forth it’s almost like I can’t stop thinking about you. I get so fucking excited to check the mail whenever I roll back into town. It’s like… I don’t know, it’s like Christmas every time I see your handwriting in my box. Remember the time you wrote your name on my thigh in Sharpie? That stayed on for like a week. I shoulda gotten it inked on. That’d be something, huh? Branded by a Winchester. 

Fuck, Dean, I really hope you’re not mad at me. I really want to call you, but we said we wouldn’t. Just write me back, please. 

I’ll be in your neck of the woods next week. Got turned onto a haunting up in Abilene. Maybe we can meet on the road somewhere? Please? 

Hey, did you know there’s a Hunter, Kansas? Wonder why they didn’t build the bunker there. I don’t know, made me laugh when I was looking at the map. 

Anyway- Please write me back. Or call. Or text. Or send a damned pigeon with a tiny letter taped to its foot. I don’t care, how, just do it please. Even if you’re mad at me and don’t want to talk anymore, I get it. But please. Just let me know, OK?

I’m sorry. 

Love, Y/N

Dear Y/N,

I didn’t know you and my brother were writing to each other like this, but I found your last few letters to him in his private P.O. Box. I didn’t even know he had one of his own, but I guess we all keep secrets from those we love. I hope you don’t mind that I read your letters. Not all of them, but the last two that came through. Please know that Dean would have responded if he could have, I know he would have. He talked about you a lot recently. Said you two were in contact and that he was hoping to find some time to meet you for a vacation. I don’t know where you guys were planning on going, but I found a new Hawiian shirt in his closet with the tags still on it. 

I know we spoke on the phone after he passed, but I wanted to send this to you. I was cleaning up his stuff and found his notepad. Looks like he’d started a letter before we left for Canton. I think he’d want you to have it. 

I’m closing up the Bunker soon. I don’t really know where I’ll go, but I can’t be here right now. Not without my brother. 

I’ll always be around if you need anything or want to talk. I’ll always answer the phone for you, Y/N. 

Be well,

Sam Winchester

Y/N/N, 

If I could take it back I would. Every fucking word. I think about it now and I know we made the wrong choice. I know we could have made it work if we tried. But we are both total fuck ups who can’t be normal. We just can’t. 

Forgive me

That’s dog slobber up there, not tears. Just fyi. Definitely not tears. I think I might have been a little drunk when I started writing and then well-

Anyway- Maine sounds awesome. We were there once but no time for lobster rolls. Guess I missed out. 

Not much to report since the last letter. Been kinda quiet here. But… I did apply for a job. Well, I filled out the application. Well, I started filling it out. It’s actually underneath this notepad right now. I’ll get to it. I will. I just need a good kick in the ass. Or maybe a pinch… wink wink

I absolutely think we need to get together. Pick some place stupid like the World’s Largest Frying Pan or South of The Border. I’ll meet you. Just say when. 

Guess this letter will take a little longer to finish. We’re leaving for Ohio in a little bit. There’s a buncha vampire dicks making a mess. Gonna take ‘em to batting practice. Show them my machete swing. I’ll give a full report when we’re back home

Dean Dean, 

I made it to the beach. It’s hot, like stupid hot. Had to stand in the water just to keep my toes from burning. I’ve been sitting here for hours trying to think of something to say, but all I can say is I love you. I miss you. I wish you were here with me. I wish things had been different. I wish and wish and wish. 

If I throw this into the ocean will it get to you somehow or will my words just wash away like the sand? 

I’ll see you again someday. I hope so, anyway. Let’s just pretend I’m destined for Heaven. I know you’re up there. You were too good not to be. You sacrificed so much, cared so much, saved so many people. I know you made it. If there’s any mercy in this universe, I’ll be up there someday too. Just don’t have too much fun without me. 

I love you, Dean. Always. 

Y/N

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[willixmsonswife]

blind date/leah williamson

*leah williamson x fem!reader *what happens if you are on a blind date and stood up by the person you were supposed to meet but a beautiful blonde comes to you rescue? *fluff ig? *1.3k words (1.7k with the bonus) .................................

My first blind date. I don't think I've ever been this nervous. Why did Beth even set me up? I didn't need it. I mean, yeah, I'm not dating anyone at the moment and I'm not good at flirting but did she have to make it that obvious and set me up with someone? I never met that girl and Beth didn't even want to tell me her name. How was I supposed to know who she was?

I sighed before I turned around on my bed, almost falling out of it. My hand reached for my phone, which was laying on the nightstand. In my stress, I dialed the first number that came to my mind. "Hello?" I almost threw my phone across the room. That was not my best friend. "Hello? Is someone there?" I had to answer now, right? "Hi. Eh it's y/n. We met like 2 weeks ago, on that event. I was there with Beth and Viv." I mentally facepalmed myself for calling HER out of all people. The women I've had a crush on for a year now, captain of the Lionesses, Leah Williamson. "Oh yeah y/n, I remember. What's up?" Was that my mind making things up or did her tone change when I said my name? It was probably nothing. "Actually I wanted to call Beth. I must've dialed the wrong number sorry for disturbing you." I was about to hang up when I heard her say something. "No no, don't worry you didn't disturb me at all. I was pretty bored actually."

"Oh, okay." My response was followed by an awkward silence. "So what are you up to this evening?" Should I tell her about the blind date? Would she even be bothered to know about it? "I'm actually going on a date."

"Oh you're dating someone? I didn't know that."

"Surprised? Don't you think that people ask me out?" I chuckled as Leah searched for a plausible answer.

"Eh- I- No, I do. It's just-"

"Don't worry, it's just a stupid blind date Beth set me up for. Apparently I'm not capable of finding the 'true love' myself." That made Leah laugh and I couldn't help but join in. Her laugh was really infectious, I had to admit that. "Where does your mysterious date take you, if I'm allowed to know?"

"We're going to the new restaurant in town."

"Oh the Italian one? I only heard good things about it but you'll have to tell me if they're true once you come back."

"I will do that. Alright, I'm gonna have to hang up now. I have to get ready if I wanna be there at 9."

"Well have fun then. It was nice talking to you, maybe we could meet up in the near future?"

"Yeah I would love that. I'll let you know when I'm free. Bye Leah."

"Bye y/n."

That definitely went better than expected but now I really had to get going. I stood up and walked over to my closet. I picked a nice navy blue dress that I hadn't worn in a while and matching high heels. my makeup was done 20 minutes later and my hair only took 15. With enough time to spare, I decided to drive to the restaurant and wait for her there.

.................................

"Hi, I have a reservation at 9 under the name y/l/n."

"Ah yes. Please follow me."

I followed the nice women to our table and sat down. "Would you like to order something to drink while you wait?"

"Yes, just a water please."

And with that she left. I looked around the restaurant and tried to calm my nerves by concentrating on the decoration, the color of the walls, literally anything. I fidgeted with the rings on my fingers while I watched the door carefully as if I could miss her walking in. The waitress came back with my water but I just took one sip before placing it in front of me. The minutes passing felt like hours and I got more and more nervous. Multiple people walked in but they all sat at different tables. Every time I heard the door open, I looked up and hoped that it would be her but it never was. After a while, I looked on my phone and saw that it was already 9:45 pm. She wasn't coming. I felt the entire hope just disappearing with that realization. I got ditched by a person I didn't even know. I did my hair and makeup for nothing. I was excited and stressed for absolutely no reason. Disappointed by how the evening turned out, I leaned down to pick up my purse. That was when I heard a voice. "Sorry that I'm so late. The traffic was awful." I looked up to see the bluest eyes I had ever seen. Wait, I knew those eyes. And that blonde hair. And that voice. "Leah? What the hell are you doing here?" For a second I completely forgot my crush on her and stared at her like she was some alien from outer space. "I'm here to save your night."

"Elaborate please." I leaned back in my chair while she sat down on the one in front of me. "Well your date didn't come, did she?" I shook my head and another wave of disappointment hit me. "Definitely her loss. But anyway, I'm here now. I can't just let you sit at this table, all alone, that would be mean."

"You know when you said 'near future', I thought you meant next week or something but not tonight." She chuckled and I couldn't help but smile. "Yeah, I wasn't planning this either trust me. But let's see where the night brings us, shall we?"

"Alright, fine with me."

.................................

The evening was simply amazing. Leah and I talked about everything and I felt like I was on cloud nine. The food was delicious and the three hours we spent together felt like 10 minutes. She offered to pay but I didn't accept. Instead I paid for both of our meals. As we made our way out of the restaurant, our hands brushed against each other and little fireworks erupted in my whole body. We walked side by side in a comfortable silence until we reached my car. "So this is it, right?" I turned around and looked straight in Leah's eyes. Big mistake. I could feel my cheeks turning crimson red and Leah trying to hide her cheeky smile was just a confirmation that I was blushing. "I guess so." She took a deep breath. "y/n, I really really liked talking to you and all of this felt so, so-" She searched for the perfect word but I already knew it. "Natural?"

"Exactly. That's why I would love to take you out sometime in the near future. And this time I mean next week and not tomorrow night." A big smile made its way onto my face. "I would love that."

"But how about I make it up to you."

"Make what up to me?"

"You paid, so obviously I'm going to give you something back."

"Leah I really don't want your money, I-"

"Oh don't worry, I wasn't talking about money."

Before I could say something, she leaned towards me and my brain just turned off. I felt her soft lips on mine and I instantly knew that it was going to be favorite feeling of all time. I kissed her back and arms made their way around her neck. We only parted when air became a problem but my arms stayed exactly where they were. As soon as we locked eyes and I couldn't help but notice the sparkle in hers. "That was way better than any amount of money."

"I hope so cause I was planning on doing it again." We both smiled at each other and I was sure that this evening couldn't have been any better.

.................................

Bonus:

"Leah are you sure that they're gonna like me?" I anxiously looked at her and she took my hands in hers. "Princess, they're going to like you just as much as I do. I have no idea how they couldn't." She squeezed my hands reassuringly and I felt a part of the nervousness leaving my body. "Alright if you say so. Then let's go." I put a smile on my face and followed Leah into the locker room. She knocked and several women answered. "Come in!" She turned to me one last time and I just nodded, not sure if I could form actual words right now. She opened the door and we stepped inside. "Hi girls, I already told you that I wanted you to meet someone very special to me. This is y/n. My girlfriend." As soon as those words left her mouth I could feel every pair of eyes on me. "Hi, it's so nice to finally meet you." Beth walked to me and engulfed me into a big hug. "Finally! I thought you'd never show yourself here, god." I laughed and hugged her back. After that, I answered a lot of questions from everyone in the room. I also got into a nice conversation with Jen and Katie. We even agreed to meet each other for lunch the next week. All of the stress that I felt before this meeting was totally unnecessary. Everyone was incredibly welcoming and they were all so nice to talk to!

After an hour or so, Leah and I left. We still had to drive home, make dinner and watch the movie she promised me earlier that day. I intertwined our fingers as we walked to the car and started talking about her teammates nonstop until we got to her car. "You were so right, I shouldn't have worried about this. Your teammates are way nicer than you're always saying."

"Oh just wait until you get to know them a bit better. You're gonna be pranked by Katie, Lia is going to spam you with messages and-"

"I absolutely don't care. I love them."

"Well I only hope that you don't love them more than me." She grinned and I couldn't help but tease her a little bit. "Ah I don't know about that. Let's see, shall we?" I got a playful slap on my shoulder in response. "I'm joking babe. I'll always love you more, more than anyone actually."

"I love you too darling."

.................................

this is my first fic on tumblr so I'd be happy about some opinions :) also, i'm taking requests if you have some

[szasfuckingwife]

PROJECT X

EREN YEAGER X FEM!READER

WARNINGS: Drug use, Alcohol use, Eren being a cocky bastard

A/N: literally watched the project x movie for the first time recently and it was fucking crazy. I’d love to go to a party like that, as long as it’s not my house.

“Come on [Y/N]! It’s gonna be huge and everyone’s going!”, your friend pleads through your phone. If you imagine hard enough, you can see her furrowed brows and her crossed fingers.

A stupid high school soirée is the last thing you want to go to. A house full of sweaty boys and bimbo girls. Drug getting passed around like candy whilst alcohol becomes a pool that suddenly everyone wants to dive in. You’re no moralist, and you have been to your fair share of house parties but when you hear it’s at Eren Yeagers house, all desires to go suddenly disappear.

An aggressive scoff leaves your lips, “Lana, I’m not fucking going, he’s gonna be there all cocky and shit.”

“Oh you’re just scared you’re gonna see your ex grinding on some girl. You’re failing to see that it’s the perfect opportunity to show him what you’re missing.”

As much as you hate to admit it, your best friend might just be exactly right. Why does Eren get to have all the fun whilst you lay behind the doors of your bedroom?

“Fine…Tomorrow you said?”

After a few empty promises, your mother finally decides to grant you permission to go to a ‘gathering’ with some of your friends.

Little does she know the sight that is before you is much more of a gathering than she ever dreamt of.

Disregarding the state in which Erens front yard was left, you see the party you feared except ten times worse. A pool full of skinny dipping teens, college guys handing out drinks that you can’t even spell and the great boom of the DJs speaker that you swore shook the whole house.

“Fuck, I should’ve stayed home.” You shout in your best friends ear, the crease in her brow showing you she didn’t hear a word you said.

If was up to you, you wouldn’t have filled your red cup this full but, of course, a frat boy poured your drink for you. And if it wasn’t for that, you wouldn’t have seen yourself in this situation.

The repetitive bass of music combined with the shoving if the crowned had you spill your drink over some really tall guy.

Like, really tall.

“Ayo, what the fuck?!” He exclaimed, turning around to see you, wide eyed. “Watch where you’re fucking goin!”

Your mouth falls open as you try come up with something, anything. “I’m so sorry, I-it was an accident..”, the look on his face being the cause of your stammer

He looks at you, sternly and with more anger, “Always you high school girls, dumb and ditzy.”

Again, your mouth falls open but for a different reason. You didn’t even want to come here and when you do arrive, first thing you’re hit with is a ballsy remark by a fucking frat boy?

“I said it was a fucking accident, what more do you want me to say-” “I just got this shirt today too!”

The guy was pissing you off, tall with no brains and an absolute dickhead.

“Matt!”, an eerily too familar voice yelled. “Chill the fuck out…”

His chestnut brown locks are slicked back into his infamous man bun, tattoos leaking from his tight fitted tee, a lit blunt in between his fingers. You don’t even need to be facing him to know that he’s probably biting the inside of his cheek.

When you turn around, you see your ex : Eren Yeager. His olive eyes stare into yours softly, before he narrows his eyes towards the man behind you. “It was an accident she said, give my girl a break.”

You look up at him when he puts his arm over your shoulder, reeling you into his warm embrace. Matt looks at the both of you, rolls his eyes and decides to continue with his stupid dance.

When he leaves, Eren finally gets a good look at you. He’s almost proud you chose to finally wear that short cargo skirt that flaunted the curve of your ass. He remembers buying you it about two months ago and he also remembers you being scared to wear it because you didn’t want him to think you were seeking other peoples attention.

Yet here you are.

Short beige skirt and a well cropped tee.

“Y’know, if I was really your ‘girl’, you’d tell him to leave. But of course you didn’t.” Your words pulled him out of his shortlived trance. “Always the people pleaser. You know I know that better than anyone.”

He chuckles, “I missed you too, [Y/N]. You look good, that’s the skirt I bought you.”

That’s why I wore it, to piss you off is what you wanted to say, but you know better than to boost his already inflated ego. “Surprised your mom let you host another party, considering what happened last time.”

He smirks at the way you completely ignore his compliment and laughs it off. “She doesn’t know.”

“She doesn’t know?” You ask, feeling nothing but anger towards him because Carla has been nothing but sweet to you and doesn’t deserve the mess that her son will inevitably leave.

“Relax…She’s out of town on a business trip and will be back on Monday. The house will be spotless by then.”

As you look around, you wonder how Eren will clean the whole house in the mere two days before his mom arrives. I mean, three condoms lying on the patio isn’t exactly something you can miss.

“You should come over when she comes back.”, Eren suggested, looking into your eyes deeply. “She misses you too, y’know.”

“Can’t. I have plans on Monday.” You reply.

He groans, “That’s why you have six other days of the week, [Y/N].”

Just as you were rolling your eyes, you felt a hand grip tightly on your arm.

“Oh my God, [Y/N]!”, Sasha almost tackles you to the ground as she wraps her arms around you. “I haven’t seen you in like…forever.”

It was rocket science that you were avoiding Eren’s close friends after the break up. But you still can’t get over the fact that they were truly great friends and fun to be around.

One by one, most of his friends greet you. Sasha, Connie, Armin, Jean and Mikasa all cheese at you whilst completely ignoring Eren.

The beer pong, skinny dipping and overall, dancing had worn you out. You along with Lana followed Sasha and Mikasa. If it weren’t for Sasha’s mention of weed, you’re pretty sure you’d be home by now.

When you walk through the door, your met with that putrid smell of weed. Whilst marijuana never bothered you itself, the smell was something else.

Jean is sat with Connie, rolling some blunts whilst Reiner, Armin and Pieck are opposite them, talking about whatever.

However, the absence of weed on the table caught you off guard.

“So…where’s the weed?”, You ask.

“‘Scuse me, sweetheart.” Eren. Again.

He walks past you carrying a small bag of weed and dumps it on the table. You mentally slap yourself; of course he’d be here.

After a little chit chat, a joint gets passed between all of you in a circle.

“Fuck sake, Connie!” Jean groaned loudly as he slapped his friend on the back of his head. “Stop fuckin hogging it!”

Eren scowls when he sees you giggling at Jean. She’s just tryna make me jealous.

“We should play Paranoia.” Sasha jumps in her seat.

“The fuck is that?”

“Basically, I pick someone, for example, Connie, and whisper a question in his earlike ‘who has the stinkiest dick?’” She gets interrupted by laughter. “And lets say, he picks Armin-”

“Why me?!” Armin shoots back, laughing in between his words.

“So then, Armin and Connie do a little game of rock paper scissors and if Armin wins, Connie has to tell him what the question was. If Armin loses, only me and Connie know the question and Armin is left Paranoid.”

Eren lets out an ‘ohhh!’ as he finally understands the name of the game.

After a few more whispers, some slaps and a lot of laughing, your friend Lana decides to pick you for a question.

“Oh God…”

A giggle leaves her lips as she covers her mouth and goes to whisper in your ear.

“Who would you fuck in this room?”

Fuck.

You wish your friend had asked you a question like ‘Who’s the prettiest?’ or ‘who’s the least funny?’ but obviously, You would have to answer her crazy ass question.

Eren eyes you when he sees you shaking your head and laughing whilst hitting Lana. All that was left in his head was that he doesn’t matter what the question is, you better pick him. He can take an insult, he does everyday. But if It’s something risqué, all answers should be him.

He knew it. And you surely knew it.

“Uhm…I pick…Connie…..” Lie.

Lana quickly smacked your arm, giving you the ‘you know damn well’ look. You chuckle as you fix your hands to do a rock paper scissors with Connie.

He chuckles when he sees your fingers trembling, “You’re high as shit, focus!” He grabs your hands tightly, smirking as he does so.

And, as if every single God you’ve read about was against you, you lose the stupid little game.

“Ooh, [Y/N], spill! What was the question?” Pieck asks, her already tired eyes hanging low due to the weed.

“I’m not fucking saying a thing.” You giggle and cover your friends mouth, forcing that she shouldn’t say anything either.

The room erupts, everyone yells in frustration. You hear the desperate pleads of Sasha and the chaotic tantrum Connie throws.

However, in the corner of your eye, you see Eren, sitting on his navy bean bag, probably lean in his cup, and a stoic look on his face.

“Say the question, Lana.” Mikasa sighs.

Even with your puppy eyes, Lana ignores you. “Alright! The question was…who would [Y/N] fuck in this room?”

All of a sudden, the males in the room released a crazed cackle. You swore you saw tears coming out of Reiners eyes.

Despite that, Eren did nothing but simply roll his eyes. At least he knew you were lying.

Since Connie was picked, it was now his turn to ask a question and much to your dismay, he picked your ex.

Even with all the noise in the room, and the continuous boom and shrieks of the party outside, you try to zero in on Connie’s whisper. Trying to picture ever word he’s saying by the movement of his mouth.

Unfortunately, you came up with nothing.

“Girl or guy?” Eren asked looking at Connie, to which he replied ‘anyone’.

He knew who he was going to pick. Of course he did, you’ve pissed him off enough with that fake ass answer. So now it was his turn.

“Easy, [Y/N].”

Dick.

With a groan, you rock paper scissor him and much to your dissapointment, Eren won.

“Fuck sake, I wanted to know the question.” Jean huffed. But just then, you saw Connie whisper something in Jeans ear and you didn’t miss the way Jean shook his head at Eren with a smirk on his lips.

“Wait, no!” Lana interrupted. “Why are you lookin at him like that?”

Jean looked at Lana with a smirk, “Like what, babe?”

Lana quickly shot him a scowl as she continued, “You keep shaking your head. Now I wanna know what was said.”

Jean laughed again whilst shaking his head. The spectacle of Connie’s question seemed to be what was on everyones mind as suddenly, the whole room wanted to know including yourself.

I mean, seeing Eren pick his ex-girlfriend? The question had to be something crazy, knowing Connie and Eren.

“Bro, if [Y/N] didn’t fuck up her rock papers scissors, maybe you all would hear the question but we don’t always get what we want.” He chuckled whilst he rolled another blunt.

“Endless weed if you tell us the question.” Sasha giggled, looking at Connie with her reddish eyes.

“Tell us!”

“Can’t be that bad.”

“Just cuz’ they were dating? Who cares?”

“[Y/N], you don’t mind, right?”

All thoughts leave your mind as Pieck asks you that question. You wanted to know but you’d much rather protect your peace than get into something with Eren.

“Fuck it, I’m gonna say it myself.” Eren sighed. “The question was who is the biggest whore here?”

And just like that, the whole room fell silent, and you with it. He was sitting there, acting as if he’d done nothing wrong whilst you sit there embarrassed in front of a room of your friends.

Staying home and doing Science homework doesn’t sound half bad right now.

Suddenly, and sharply, Lana bites back. “And how the fuck is she a whore, hm? Quickly?”

“I’m not saying it’s a bad thing-” “Well, you clearly are, dickhead. Why else was Jean shaking his head at you?” Lana’s voiced raised slightly.

“Right, cuz’ [Y/N] didn’t say shit about you…” Sasha furrowed her brows, Eren groans loudly as he sees the situation he caught himself in.

You look at him, void of expression. Half mad, half speechless. But what would you except from a guy who tried to fuck you after a month dating?

“Look, I had to pick someone, no hard feelings.” His disassociation with the conversation pissed you off. He can’t just drop a bomb and then go back to lighting a spliff.

“It’s just a game, can we chill-” “Reiner, shut up.” You scoffed. “I know we broke up n all but you’ve got a lot of nerve to call me a whore considering the reason why we broke up was because you couldn’t keep your dick in your pants.”

Eren scoffed. “Yeah, classy, [Y/N], bring up the past.”

You could practically feel the anger in Lana and Sasha as they stared him down. “And you think calling her a whore is?”

“Right, because you knew the reaction you were gonna get wasn’t gonna be a good one.” Sasha eyed him down. The once bouncy brunette was now staring down one of the guys that patronised her. Jean and Connie remained in their seats not saying a word.

“God, it’s a joke. She’s not a whore, happy?”

“Fuck you, Eren. Seriously.”

Once again, the room grew silent as Eren sat there watching you as you gathered your belongings, ready to leave. The looks of pity that your friends were giving you not only embarrassed you but reminded you that you were strong.

“So…we’re not gonna finish the game?” Connie spoke.

After the party, you hadn’t acknowledged the whole argument or him. Even when your friends tried to extract some feeling out of you, you didn’t let them.

Instead, your pillow became your outlet. Your family are probably tired of all the disputed music you blasted in your room. You wept countless of tears; how could he treat you like this?

Where was the old Eren? That took you to the cinema after you begged him to watch a new film? Or that Eren who, even when it was minus whatever degrees, draped you in the warmth of his coat.

The sweet memories turn into sour ones. And whats worse is when you walk past one another in the halls.

A mountain of freshmen girls swooning behind him, and all he can think about is how nice you did your hair today. Or that one time in class where he caught you daydreaming looking ethereal.

“Bro, you seriously fumbled.” Connie cackled in his face at lunch. Eren mentally slapped himself . Next time, he’ll keep his feelings to himself.

“Listen, Eren, what you did was kinda out of line-” “She said she’d fuck Connie, out of all people!” Eren looks at Armin with nothing but disbelief in his eyes. No one understood him.

Jean shrugged as he stifled down a chuckle, “She probably used him as a scape goat. I mean who would fuck this ugly bastard?.”

Eren stared at Jean, taking in the words that his friend was spewing. A scape goat? Why didn’t he think of that?

“I don’t even care at this point. Just want my wife back, man.” The rest of the table audibly sighed when Eren began to fake cry.

“Eren.” The sternness in Armins voice made Eren sit up. “If you actually want her back. Act like it. Tell her, that you’re a dick, an egotistical narcissist, a stupid overachiever-”

“Yeah…I get it.” Eren said.

“Get on your knees if you have to. And she isn’t gonna trust you again right away. But remember, all you are asking her is for a chance to redeem yourself, not to get back together-” Armin was interrupted again by Eren’s melancholy sighs.

“But I want to get back together with her-” “Shoulda thought about that before cheating on her and calling her a whore..”, Connie muttered, finding the blatant hypocrisy in Eren’s words.

Eren looked at Connie sternly before rolling his eyes. No one understood him. He didn’t cheat on you because he didn’t love you. He cheated on you because he was insecure.

Seeing you going out with a male friend that he hadn’t even heard the name of shook him. And, oh did it shake him bad.

“I really do love her. Like I actually do.” He sighed, this time more serious and quiet. The table fell silent before the bell rang, a groan leaving Jeans lips.

“What is it now?”

“PE.” Jean answered as he got up from the table.

“Isn’t that good? Aren’t we doing track today?” Armin looked confused. Jean always loved sport.

The brunette shrugged, “I won’t see Lana. She’s got that thing.”

Eren remained silent and melancholic as the rest of the boys teased Jean about being Lovestruck.

At least one of them had a stable relationship.

pt2 comin soon?🤭🤭

[wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee28374728]

Until Dawn character hcs

Sam:

Her music taste is crazy. Like the same playlist could have Beethoven, Iron Maiden, The BeeGees and Taylor Swift

Does aerobics in her pajamas

Doesn't know how to order at Starbucks (she just wanted a medium)

Had a dog walking business in high school

Knows how to surf

Will absolutely destroy you in most strategy based board games

Favorite holiday is Halloween

Chris:

Dog person AND cat dad

Far sighted

Huge history nerd, had a ww2 phase in high school that never completely went away

Guy at a camping trip who tells the ghost story that leads up to a joke

Knows exactly what to do when a woman is on her period

Nervous fidgets; bouncing leg, tapping on desk/table, etc

Knew where everything was in his school backpack at all times

Ashley:

Say it with me people: Only. Fucking. Child.

Will get mad at you for saying pumpkin spice latte is basic

Was a horse girl in middle school

Owns more scented candles than a bath and body works

Has gotten her fortune told at a carnival and taken it pretty seriously

Had braces

Smokes weed

Mike:

Track and field

Can't find the clit

Paid other people to do his homework

Wanted to be a firefighter when he was 6

Shockingly scared of bugs, used to make Emily kill them for him, but Jess won't do it

Can swim but doesn't like it

Was really close with Sam when they were younger, Sam is the one who introduced him to the group.

Jessica:

Used to be much happier and more chill before puberty, after which she felt pressure to live up to her looks

Her and Emily used to be super close and she misses it

Was a Frozen kid and still watches it a lot

Most definitely bi curious at least(Emily to blame)

Reads her horoscope but doesn't actually take it seriously

Emily:

Wayyyy to much Disney Channel in her early childhood, now loves drama

The middle of many siblings, acts the way she does for more attention

Was vegetarian at some point

Secretly misses being close with Jess, but makes sure no one knows

Needs rain sounds to sleep

Really wants Matt to stand up to her, this is why she's so hard on him

Matt:

Easily confused when women aren't completely direct

Probably smoked weed at least once, but quit doing it when he started doing sports

Nervous around babies(so small what if he panicked and dropped them)

Had an earring in one ear at one point, but his parents had him take it out and now the piercing is healed over

Can't tell the difference between nail polish shades

Josh:

Would fight god in the Denny's parking lot for someone if they gave him a hug

His bedroom/college dorm is covered in so many movie and band posters you can't see the wall anymore

Talks to cats like they're people

Confused rich(wait his is the only family with six cars??)

Jokes about sex and women, but if he saw a girl being taken advantage of he's gonna slap a frat bro

Owns a VHS tape player

Friggin s l e e p s in checkered shirts

Hannah:

Plant mom

Inspirational quotes on the wall

Best party is a book and a blanket

Nature documentaries

Josh's partner in crime

Loved dolls as a little kid, not Barbies, like baby dolls and porcelain dolls

Fairy lights in her bedroom

Loves music, Josh started buying her cassette tapes and now she collects them

Beth

Can you say LESBIAN?

Is never seen without her hat

Tried to stop Josh and Hannah from causing trouble, it never worked

Uggs and leggings

Smokes weed with Ashley

Her side of her and Hannah's bedroom is so much neater and cleaner

Total metalhead but no one knows bcs "she doesn't look it"

Dr. Hill:

Accidentally opened YouTube once while trying to find the news app

Can't work if the music has lyrics, it's too distracting

Might have a husband

Has such doctor handwriting that he can't hardly read it himself

Coffee addict

911 on speed dial(he's worried about all his patients)

The real Dr Hill is really nice, only the hallucination version is all threatening

Flamethrower guy:

Fucking loves soup

Hasn't bought clothes in years, and got them all secondhand

Has been off the mountain exactly twice

"When did kids get this dumb?"

Secretly stays in the lodge sometimes when no one is there bcs it's shelter and it's kinda fancy

Actually feels crazy guilty for not saving the twins

Was very happy to see Mike making friends with his wolves

[astro-eats]

ABSTRAGEDY FIC

THIS TAKES PLACE BEFORE MY OTHER FICS

It was theme song time, and no one could find Gangle. She wasn't anywhere. Ragatha has already looked in her room. Zooble hadn't really looked for her yet because they know she's gonna be ok. But they were starting to doubt themselves.

Ragatha put her hand on zoobles shoulder, causing them to step away. Ragatha realized what she did and quickly apologized.

"Oh I'm sorry..!"

"its fine."

"We can't find Gangle anywhere..! I'm starting to get worried! She's not in her room, she's not in YOUR room-"

Ragatha continued talking, but zooble didn't pick any of it up. They were too focused on the fact that she went into their room. And also that Gangle was missing. She couldn't have been far. Worst case scenario, she was abstracted in the void and they were never gonna see her again which would cause them to mentally deteriorate until they also abstract and they would suffer forever and-

"Ragatha! Stop talking and go F(bleep)ING look for her!"

"O- oh! Uhm.. I- okay!"

Ragatha ran off to look for her. Zooble started to go outside of the tent. She was probably there and not dead! Hopefully.

They walk faster until they find themselves sprinting towards the carnival. They shout her name, but it wasnt responded to. They look up at the ferris wheel. She was sitting at the top. It was turned off, so she must've been up for a long time. She looked asleep, but it waa hard to tell because she was so high up.

They sigh in relief. She's alive. They didn't stop to wonder why she was up there. They go closer to the ferris wheel and push a lever, causing the wheel to spin. Gangle jerked awake at the feeling of going down. She looked around and saw zooble at the bottom. She loved the ferris wheel. She would often go.up at night and look at the digital lake. She watched zooble up until she got to the ground. She hopped off, holding her sketchbook in one arm.

"Gangle. You scared me so f(uh oh cuss word >:()ing bad."

"I'm sorry..! I fell asleep and forgot to go back into my room and-"

"Gangle its fine. I was worried you abstracted. Please just remember to go somewhere we can find you next time.."

"I- yeah of course..!"

"I have a question."

"Yeah..?"

"Why were you there? I mean, the only reason I looked here is because no one could find you anywhere in the circus."

"Exactly."

"... What?"

"I go here because no one else does.. It isn't anyones first thought when they think of places I might be.."

"My room is one of them. When ragatha told me you were lost, she said she looked in my room for you"

Gangle giggled. Her affection and attachment for zooble wasn't a secret. Whenever she was scared, so was basically wrapped around zooble. When she was upset, wrapped around zooble. When she was excited, she was wrapped around zooble. They were her 'best friend'. Really close friends. Yeah. Zooble spoke up.

"I'll try not to bother you again when you're here."

"Wait no- Please bother me..! Wait- uh- I mean I just do don't mind when you're here.. Heh..-"

"Heh. I'll keep that in mind~"

Gangle giggled like a middle school girl talking to her crush. Except she doesn't have hair to twirl around her fingers like an idiot.

Gangle found it hard to deny or convince herself she doesn't have a crush on them. They're really cool. Zooble couldn't deny their crush on her either. Zooble loved seeing her get flustered. They knew she liked them, it was obvious. But they were still too nervous to actually have the conversation with her. They were extremely good st hiding their nervousness around her though. She wasn't.

Gangle and zooble suddenly got teleported in front of caine. Ragatha had gotten caine because she was worried. Little did she know she saved Gangle from embarrassing herself from how much she was blushing. Caine spoke in his overly energetic annoying voice.

"WHERE WERE YOU TWO! I WAS WORRIED SICK! ANYWAYS WE HAVE TO DO THE THEME SONG!"

Gangle and zooble looked at each other. They both had a look on their face. They didn't want to do any of caines things today. They wanted to hang out with each other.

After practicing the theme song again, caine started explaining the adventure. Zooble interrupted him.

"Yeah I'm not doing this. Come on Gangle."

They gently grabbed gangles ribbon arm and pulled her along with them as they walk off to their room. Caine spoke up about it, a desperate tone.

"WAIT! Zooble please! Just try it!"

"... No."

Caine looked defeated and watched as Zooble left, taking Gangle with them.

Zooble opened their door and walked in, Gangle following behind them. Once the two were in, zooble closed the door. Gangle had a feeling this was going to be the moment the two have a talk about their relationship, which is why she didn't resist being pulled with them.

Zooble sat on their bed, patting the spot next to them, silently telling her to sit next to them. She listened. She did that a lot, listen to anything they said. There was no specific reason she did. It might me a result of her trust for them. Or a result of her trauma, making her fear the consequences of being disobedient. She knew not to fear them. They are her safe person. Which is why she loves them so much.

"Gangle?"

"Yeah..?"

"I need to tell you something."

Gangles face was hot and red as she nervously nodded. It could be the best news in her entire life. Zooble spoke again.

"I like you. A lot."

Gangles eyes lit up. She kind of knew what they were gonna say, but it felt so good hearing it. She smiled/

"I like you too..!"

Zooble looked at her. Despite their emotionless (except annoyed and angry) nature, they were happy. They spoke, their voice slightly changed from their usual. They were happy.

"So are we a thing?"

"I would love to be.."

Gangle smiled as she laid her head on their arm, blushing. Zooble, despite not liking physical touch, liked HER physical touch. Only hers. So they wrapped an arm around her.

Gangle looked at them with big, happy, sweet eyes. She did that often. Zooble noticed her big eyes, chuckling quietly. She looked cute.

Gangle felt actually happy. She never really feels happy. She just doesn't feel as empty. There wasn't much things here that made her happy. Especially when Jax is alive. But zooble made her happy.

Zooble was happy too. They were never happy. Ever. But it was like there were ribbons wrapped around their heart.

The two fit perfectly together. Plastic and porcelain. Two very physically (and mentally) unstable people. Zooble was strong at what Gangle was weak at, in vice versa. But the two still had things in common.

They find themselves laying comfortably together. Gangle was better at showing affection through touch, she she was hugging all over them. Zooble wasn't good at it, but they're good at laying down and letting Gangle cuddle them.

(WHY DOES EVERYTHING END EITH CUDDLIMG OMGGG)

(ILLL TRY TO WRITE MORE TOMORROW)

[aishabellasbigblogofeverything]

My post about hating the Barbie movie and how it actually spat in the face of feminism and all that the franchise stands for is done and dusted, I'm afraid, but that being said there are still some points I left out of it that I would like to address, and I will do so here:

The movie portraying women as hopeless endless victims who have no hopes of succeeding or getting what they want out of life is bad enough, but there's a brief blink-and-you'll-miss it scene where Barbie is taking Gloria and Sasha back to Barbieland, and as they're on the spaceship, she says to them that women control everything and have all social and political power, which is fine...but THEN she goes "basically everything men do in your world, women do in ours" and that...that line just makes me so appalled and angry I could SPIT. Like you're really spelling out that you think women in the real world have no power or control in any aspect of society? I understand that it's supposed to be "commentary"(it's not good commentary tho) and that the real world IS a patriarchy, but we HAVE women in power in our world too! We HAVE female Supreme Court Justices! We HAVE women in high office! We HAVE female mayors and CEOs! We HAVE women in positions of power and leadership, period! And yet Barbie creates this illusion that women in our world such as Sasha and Gloria would have NO knowledge of or point of reference for women in power who do any important shit at all; it's completely fucking absurd. But then again, this movie was written and directed by a white feminist. A white feminist, who, like all white feminists, has a complete miserable victimhood/defeatist complex. So of course she projects it onto her female characters(even female characters of color, who are ofc SUPPOSED to be more sad and let-down than SHE is!), like the sad, pathetic fuck she is. And y'all wonder why I hate persecution flips so much. We need to shove that bullshit trope six feet under. If you want to tell a story about the patriarchy, then FUCK, WRITE ABOUT THE ACTUAL GODDAMN PATRIARCHY!!! Don't just do this nonsense "uwu what if men were the oppressed ones and women were the privileged--" no. Stop. Cut it the fuck out. This is getting ridiculous.

This part is probably incidental but fuck that, I'm still gonna knock it. Sasha and Gloria never actually get to experience the matriarchal utopia, and I just find that so depressing. Despite the bleak and frankly miserable lives that they lead, they never get to experience the escapist freedom of living in a society in which they are in charge, where womanhood isn't looked down upon and is in fact honored, where they have power and aren't in danger of being stalked, followed, or killed by men just for walking down the street. They leave their patriarchal world, hoping to see a world that is better, and instead enter a world that is just as bad and equally as patriarchal as the one they tried to escape from. It's truly depressing, especially for Gloria who specifically wanted to get away from her anxieties with real life and just have fun with her daughter for a bit. Instead she has to be confronted with ANOTHER patriarchy, watch the childhood doll she loved and played with have a panic attack and give up on life just like she did, and then give her infamous, cliche, and paint by numbers "being a woman is suffering" corny as hell speech. Before reinventing the matriarchy and getting her power back only by leaning in to patriarchal stereotypes about women's bodies and sexualities. And then leaving back for her regular patriarchy world without getting to experience any of it. It's almost like the movie was literally saying that women will never be able to free themselves from patriarchy and that a better world than this one does not exist. Patriarchy is insurmountable and all-prevailing, says this movie. It's truly tragic.

And honestly, with regards to that shitty ass clusterfuck of a speech, isn't it like, so totes ironic, that part of Gloria's speech is her complaining that women have to apologize for men's bad behavior...only for the "happy" ending of the movie to involve BARBIE HAVING TO APOLOGIZE FOR KEN'S BAD BEHAVIOR?!?!!??!?! Like no one fact-checked that shit and went "wait, something ain't right"? Are you fucking kidding me?!?!?!?!?! I hate that scene with every fiber of my being and realizing this makes me hate it even more now. Just, ugh.

Tldr: Fuck this movie, but then again, I've said that shit like...several times before. lol.

[smileydk]

The Town Weirdo

Pairing: Misfit!Wooyoung x Popular!Reader

Summary: Jung Wooyoung was a misfit. He didn't look different, he didn't dress too differently, he didn't act different, someone just decided that he didn't fit into the frame, and everyone hopped on the idea. Everyone except one, who didn’t want to judge before knowing both sides of a story.

cw/tw: bullying, harsh language, mental and physical abuse, domestic violence, fluffy, angst, mentions of rape and kidnapping

They acted as if he didn't existed. They all thought that maybe if they don't think about him, he'd disappear. He was like a bogger in the school's nose, like an eyelash in your eye. Simply there to annoy, never to do any good.

Even the adults treated him like nothing.

He was never called on in class, even if he raised his hand. He rarely ever got his tests back, grades would be shit because they didn't like him.

He hadn't done anything to be hated. He had always kept to himself, he'd always studied, he was (technically) a straight A-student, he'd never done anything to offend anyone.

He always wore an oversized, black hoodie, black, baggy cargo pants and a pair of purple air Jordans. Occasionally the hoodie would change color, but mostly he wore all black. He fit into the school's fashion perfectly.

Yet, for whatever reason, the football team decided that since everyone hated him, why not make his life fucking miserable? His life wasn't hard enough already, with everyone avioding him like the plague.

A young girl, no older than 5 years, had gone missing a few months ago. In such a small town news traveled fast. Everyone knew about her disappeareance.

At first everyone were worried, everyone looked for her. But as time passed and nothing was found, people needed someone to put the blame on. So why not choose the most hated boy in town?

Jung Wooyoung.

He had nothing to lose anyways.

''You know the girl who disappeared? He probably took her. He's probably a little pervert. He probably got her locked up in her basement and uses her whenever he feels the urge to''

Comments like these were almost normalized in the small town. Something that didn’t sit right with one girl.

She couldn't understand what he ever did to be hated, even by his own mom. She'd seen him sleeping on a bench, outside an old and abandoned restaurant.

She felt bad for him. Her own family was of high status in the town. They were rich and donated a lot of money to the small hospital, the two schools and such.

Kim Jiwoo, the youngest in the whole family, had always been rather open minded. She never liked judging people by others words. She wanted to know him, not what everyone thought about him.

She sighed as she heard her "friends" talking about the boy once more. They weren't really her friends, they simply hung out with her because of money and status, and they never had anything kind to say about anyone but themselves and Jiwoo.

''Hey, do you actually think he keeps her in his basement?'' Ara asked in an amused tone, knowing very well that Wooyoung heard her.

''Yeah, of course he does'' Hana replied in even more amused tone as she noticed that Wooyoung posture changed slightly. ''He’s a pervert. He probably keeps her in the basement, has her way with her when he wants, and he probably keeps pictures of her in his phone and rubs one out while watching it''

''I hope he falls down a well and withers away, alone in the dark'' Ara finished before they both started cackling.

Jiwoo let out a tired sigh and turned around in her seat. ''Would both of you shut up? There's no concrete evidence that Wooyoung's done shit, and how would you feel if people spread a rumour about you murdering someone? Or raping? Or kidnapping?''

Minho, the quarterback smirked. He heard the whole conversation since he literally sat next to Jiwoo. Jiwoo'd just assumed that he never listened to them.

''Challenge accepted!''

Jiwoo turned to the boy. ''A) Did you just Barney Stinson me? B) What challenge?''

''I'm gonna steal Wooyoung's phone and prove that he's a pervert!''

Jiwoo sighed. She decided, for once, to take action instead of being all talk. So she stood up, in the middle of the teacher's introduction, and walked over to Wooyung's desk.

The corner in the back.

''Can I sit here?''

The boy looked up from the desk, on which he was currently carving a face, since no one cared what he did anyways. He looked confused. Why would someone wanna sit with him?

He mumbled a quiet ''sure'' and put away the knife and sat up straight.

He knew carrying a knife around and carving shit into the furniture didn't exactly support his attempt on proving himself innocent, but after a while he stopped caring about what everyone thought about him.

''Do you wanna hang out after school?'' Jiwoo asked, still that gorgeous, model smile on her lips.

Wooyoung felt a bit ashamed as he stared at her lips. He wondered what they’d feel like. What they’d taste like.

''Why would you wanna hang out with me?'' He asked and turned his attention back to his little carving.

Jiwoo shrugged. She didn’t know why. She was simply a social butterfly. And he intrigued her.

''I like being social. You intrigue me for some reason, and you’re the only person in the school who doesn’t kiss my ass for status and money ''

''Well, sorry little miss daddy's Princess, but that ain’t gonna happen, ever''

The girl realized how it sounded. ''No! I didn’t mean it like that. I like that you don’t do it. To be honest, I don’t really have any real friends''

Wooyoung let out a sarcastic laugh. ''Oh yeah? Couldn’t daddy’s money buy you some?''

That was it for Jiwoo. Here she was, being as nice as humanly possible when you don’t know someone, especially when there’s a rumor that he’d murdered someone and another one stating that he’d kidnapped and raped a five year old girl.

She always tried to keep the judgement low, or non-existent. But anyone would be kind of concerned with a murder rumour. She thought she was doing a great job at being nice, yet he treated her like a piece of shit.

''Listen here you fucking asshole, I came over here to try and be nice. I wanted to prove to the town that you’re not some weirdo, kidnapping rapist, but apparently you hate everyone, and I can’t judge you, but I have never done shit to you. In fact, when we were in 4th grade, I beat up Dae for bullying you, but fuck you''

Jiwoo started packing up her stuff to go back to her other desk. They both knew all eyes were on them since Jiwoo’s outburst wasn’t the most silent person in the universe.

Wooyoung cursed himself for being such an asshole. It was a habit at this point. If someone tried being nice, his defense mechanism would turn on. He just assumed no one ever wished him well.

He grabbed her arm. ''Look, I’m sorry. You’re right. It’s just… with everyone being nice to me, and then shoving me down a well or similar, it’s hard accepting when someone’s being genuine''

Yes, it had actually happened. Wooyoung was seven and his "best friend" had asked him to come to his house and hang out. He did, and his "best friend" shoved him into a well. In which he had to lay in for three hours, crying his eyes out.

The girl smiled. She could accept that as an apology. And it seemed quite logical what he said. Survival instincts.

She sat back down and smiled. ''So, do you wanna hang out? My dad’s pulling out his ugly old barbecue. When he cooks, there’s enough to feed the whole town. I promise, if they do anything that makes you uncomfortable, you can leave ''

The boy thought about it. ''Sure, uhm, but I gotta do one thing before we go to yours''

Whispers followed his reply. People were sure that Jiwoo pranked him, that she only asked him out of pity, or because she had a bigger plan. All were wrong. She genuinly wanted to get to know the man.

The boy intrigued her, so she acted on it. And to be fair, he was ridiculously good-looking under the black hood.

As the class went on, Jiwoo couldn't be more bored. ''Does anyone know the answer to question 10?'' The teacher looked at the class.

Wooyoung raised his hand, something Jiwoo'd seen him do a lot, but he never got to answer since the teachers seemed to hate him just as much as the students.

''No one?'' The teacher asked, his gaze avoiding Wooyung's corner.

''1939'' Wooyoung said out loud, tired of being ignored.

''Don't speak unless I tell you to!'' The teacher snapped in a rude tone.

Wooyoung rolled his eyes and sunk back down in his seat. ''Asshole'' He mumbled under his breath, causing Jiwoo to chuckle.

While Wooyoung packed up his stuff Minho passed by their desk. It confused them both since he sat in the front.

Without missing a beat Minho snatched Wooyoung's phone from the table and rushed out of the classroom. Jiwoo cursed the fact that Minho was the quarterback. He literally got the position because he could run.

Wooyoung let out a quiet sigh and slung his bag over his shoulder. Jiwoo copied his actions. ''Let's get your phone back, eh?''

''Uhm, I can survive without it''

''Wuss, I'll do it. Let's go''

They headed out of the classroom and spotted everyone in the hallway, gathered around the tall quarterback.

Jiwoo let out a quiet sigh. She walked up to Minho, after pushing her way through the small crowd. She tapped him harshly on the shoulder. When he turned around Jiwoo quickly withdrew her arm and punched the boy in the face as hard as she could.

A small crunch was heard and Wooyoung's phone dropped, right into Jiwoo's expecting hands.

''Don't take things that aren't yours'' Jiwoo smiled sweelty and threw Wooyoung his phone.

Wooyoung pointed behind her. Jiwoo turned around and spotted the quarterback charging at her. ''Why does he have to make things so difficult? Hold this, love'' She handed Wooyoung her bag.

Wooyoung froze for a short moment. Jiwoo called him "Love".

Minho stopped before her and stared down at her. ''Listen here Kim-''

''No, you listen her Park, you've been an asshole since the day I met you. You've never been nice to anyone but your minions, you've never treated Wooyoung as a person. My parents basically run this town, my dad's a lawyer, my mom's... important, let's see who wins?''

Minho fell silent and stared at the very short, yet fiesty girl. ''Well... fuck off''

''Now to the rest of you assholes, did you find a single picture of anything? Any proof? Anything?''

No one said anything.

''That's what I thought!''

''He had a picture of you!''

Jiwoo slowly turned around and looked at Wooyoung. He looked horrified. ''Can I see?''

Wooyoung unlocked his phone and handed it over to Jiwoo. She scrolled through his cameraroll and found two pictures of her. One in the dining hall where she sat alone, side profile towards him as the sun came through thw window, and one of her lauhging about... whatever.

''I look amazing- wow'' Jiwoo mumbled and zoomed in on herself. ''Be gone, idiots! I see no harm in these'' She handed the phone back to the owner. ''Let's head to mine then, loverboy''

''Jiwoo! You coming?'' Ara and Hana asked and turned to their friend. They were planning to hang out earlier, but she wasn't too excited about that anymore.

''No, I'm gonna hang out with Wooyoung'' The girl replied without even looking at her two friends.

The two girls scoffed and looked at the boy. ''Why? He's a kidnappeing pervert''

''So? Do any of you have any proof, whatsoever, of anything? I'm heading out with him, bye''

Wooyoung followed Jiwoo out to her car. His eyes widened. ''Holy fuck, that's a nice car''

A chuckle left the girl's lips. The laugh sounded like heaven to Wooyuong's ears. ''Well, get in. Where did you need to go?''

Wooyoung snapped out of his daydreaming and looked at the girl. ''Oh, uhm, just outside town. I do some charity work at a orphanage there''

Jiwoo smiled. ''You're such sweetheart''

The boy blushed. ''Well, I know how it is living without parents so.... yeah''

She smiled and started the car. Jiwoo drove and Wooyoung gave directions to the building.

When they stopped outside the daycare and Wooyoung got out, he was immediately ambushed by kids. He squatted down and held out his arms as the kids hugged him.

Jiwoo smiled as he spoke with each of them, asking about their day. ''Oppa, who's she? Is she your girlfriend?'' One of the small girls asked with a smirk.

Wooyoung turned around and looked at Jiwoo. ''No, she's a friend. Be nice to her''

A few of the kids immediately walked up to her and started introducing themselves with wide smiles. One girl in particular had a tight grip on Wooyoung's pant leg. She seemed very shy.

Jiwoo walked up her and squatted down in front of her. ''Hello, I'm Jiwoo. What's your name?''

She hid behind Wooyoung's tall frame. ''Uhm... Arin''

''Pretty name, fits perfectly for such a pretty girl'' Jiwoo said and smiled as sweetly as she possibly could.

Arin seemed to accept it and smiled. ''You're sp pretty, Unnie. Are you Oppa's girlfriend?''

''Just a friend I'm afraid''

The small toddler pouted. ''But you're so pretty!''

Jiwoo chuckled as she leaned closer to her. ''Can you keep a super secret secret?'' The girl nodded excitedly. ''Oppa is really handsome, but you can't tell him''

''I promise!'' She giggled and ran away.

The girl stood up straight and looked at Wooyoung, who was frozen in his spot.

Kim Jiwoo, the perfect dream girl, thought he was handsome? The town's misfit, the weirdo creep?

''You there Wooyoung?'' Jiwoo waved her hand in front of his face.

''Hm? Yeah''

''Ah! Wooyoung, right? Welcome!'' Chaeyoung greeted the boy happily as Jiwoo introduced them.

Wooyoung's eyes widened as she squeezed him in a tight hug. He looked at Jiwoo with a panicked look. No one had ever shown him this much love.

''Yah, eomma, you can't just hug people I bring home. Not everyone's comfortable with that!''

The woman immediately pulled away from the hug. ''I'm so sorry Wooyoung, it's just... Jiwoo's girlfriends are all... rude, and you seem to sweet''

The boy was still surprised, as well as confused. ''So you've not heard the rumours?''

''Yeah, well, I prefer creating my own opinion'' The woman smiled sweetly. ''Food will be on the table in a minute, unless your father screws it up again''

Jiwoo chuckled and led Wooyoung up to her room. Wooyoung only stood awkwardly in the door opening, as the only time he'd ever been at someone else's house was with an old "friend" who didn't allow him on the furniture, as if he was a dog.

''Sit wherever'' Jiwoo threw her school bag into her closet and closed it. She sat down on her bed, removed her shoes, and crossed her legs.

Wooyoung carefully sat down in her office chair. He wasn't sure what to do.

''So, tell me about you. I wanna get to know you! I doubt you're a kidnapper since you volunteer at the orphanage''

The boy chuckled. ''Well, uhm, there's not much to know about me. I'm homeless since my own mother hated that everyone knew her son, especially for something bad. I volunteered at the orphanage before that. Uhm, then the girl went missing and since everyone already hated me it was easy to put the blame on me. And yeah, the rest you know''

''You can stay here if you want. We have a spare bedroom'' Jiwoo offered with that same, sweet smile she always wore when she spoke to him.

Wooyoung didn't know what to think about it. He adored it. It made the girl even more beautiful, if that was even possible, but he also felt like she only acted like this out of pity.

''Look, if you're only doing this for some kind of Univeristy resume, or pity, or some kind of... attention from the whole town, just drop the act now and I'll never bother you again''

Wooyoung was ready for her to either lash out on him for "exposing" her, or laugh and throw him out, or continue her lie, but she didn't.

''I know you think I'm doing this out of pity. I know you only see me as some... rich daddy's girl, but I genuinly want to help you, and I really think you are sweet, if you want to at least. Carving faces into the wall works against you, but yeah''

The boy was stunned.

''And I didn't lie before, you are really handsome'' Jiwoo winked and smirked.

''Thanks'' He blushed slightly and pulled up his hood again.

Jiwoo chukled. ''You're a blushy one'' She teased and took out her phone. ''Give me your number''

Wooyoung was hesitant but did as requested. ''Why?''

''Kids! Food!''

''So we can hang out again'' Jiwoo said in a duh-tone.

Wooyoung made a quiet "ah" sound and quickly entered his number into her, much newer, phone. Jiwoo took Wooyoung's phone and did the same to his. She held it up and took a silly selfie before handing it back.

''Smile'' Jiwoo smiled and directed her phone camera to Wooyoung's face. The man did as requested and smiled. ''Pretty, now let's go eat''

''So, Jung Wooyoung, correct?'' Jiwoo's father, Changkyun, turned to the new face.

''Yes, sir''

Changkyun smiled. ''He called me Sir, I like this one!''

Jiwoo chuckled as she ate. Her father loved meeting new people. Especially if they looked up to him. He enjoyed the ego-boost.

''Well, how come you two are hanging ouy? Jiwoo only has mean friends, but you seem really sweet'' Changkyun asked bluntly.

Wooyoung let out an awkward laugh. ''Well, Sir, she sat with me in math. Why I have no idea''

''Because he was intriguing, and my friends are all assholes, might as well make some new ones. And he's the only one in school I haven't spoken to before''

Chaeyoung chuckled to herself. She enjoyed Wooyoung's company, and her daughter seemed to enjoy it as well.

''So, any girls, Wooyoung?'' Chaeyoung asked.

''Eomma!'' Jiwoo glared at her mother.

''Uhm, no ma'am, afraid all the girls in school hates me or are terrified of me, well, except Jiwoo apparently'' Wooyoung smiled sweetly.

Jiwoo looked at the boy with a sweet smile. Well, according to her mother it was "adoring". Chaeyoung was convinced her daughter had found her "one".

Jiwoo and Wooyoung finished their dinner and were quick to disappeared up to her room again.

Wooyoung cursed himself as he caught himself staring at Jiwoo's lips once more.

''Fuck her lips are pretty- even prettier when she smiles''

''I can see you staring'' Jiwoo chuckled and smiled. ''You got lip-fetisch, or what?''

''N-n-no! I just- your- I- your lips are pretty''

Jiwoo chuckled and sat down in front of him. ''Oh yeah? They're pretty?''

Wooyoung didn't know what to do. He was panicking on the inside while also keeping all his focus on Jiwoo's lips. She was so close. He could smell her sweet scent. He could see the glitter specks in her pink, cherry lipgloss.

''Wanna feel them? Or taste them?'' Jiwoo knew she was frisky. But she thought she'd picked up some... hint. A small, subtle nod. Jiwoo smiled again, that sweet, gorgeous smile. That smile Wooyuong had never seen, before she looked at him.

Her smile made him feel like the only person in the entire the world. Her smile made him feel like every problem he'd ever had had disappeared. Her smile made him lose his mind and not focus on anything but her.

Jiwoo chuckled and laid a hand on Wooyoung's shoulder. ''You sure? You don't have to kiss me unless you really want to''

''I- I-... I really want to kiss you, I'm just worried that you'll be let down by me doing... being, well, me''

''Come on, my first was Minho in our class, it's hard to let me down'' She laid a hand on Wooyoung's cheek. ''And who knows, maybe I'll let you down?''

''You could probably never let me down'' Wooyoung smiled weakly.

Jiwoo smiled and laid her small hand on his cheek. She leaned closer, slowly if Wooyoung wanted to back out. He didn't. Jiwoo pressed her lips against Wooyoung's.

Wooyoung might be new to this whole thing, altough he had his fair share of kisses, but he carefully wrapped his arms around Jiwoo's waist and pulled her into his lap.

A small smile rose to the girl's lips as she straddled him. She wrapped her arms around Wooyoung's broad shoulders and pulled him closer.

The man was touch-deprived, and slightly desperate. His hands landed on her hips and his thumbs automatically started rubbing circles on them.

Jiwoo parted her lips slightly, allowing Wooyoung to do as he pleased. Wooyoung accepted the invite and started exploring her mouth with his tongue.

A small, breathy moan left Jiwoo's lips. She was also, slightly, touch-deprived.

She pulled away and chuckled slightly. ''Someone's excited''

Wooyoung blushed and rested his forehead against Jiwoo's shoulder. ''You're mean''

''Yet here you are, without your pent up walls''

''For you only''

[questionableratatouille00]

𝕺𝖚𝖙 𝖔𝖋 𝕿𝖎𝖒𝖊

Pairing: Steve Rogers x Fem!Reader

Summary: Whenever Steve was sick before the serum, you were there for him. But all these decades later, he finds just how much time he wasted back then.

Note: This is my submission for day one (drugging/sick/poisoned) of @ailesswhumptober! Does this count as whump? Probably not! Either way, I really wanted to be able to put something out, so here we are!

Warnings: Sickness, technically main character death (??), mention of medicine.

---------------------------------------------

ʙʀᴏᴏᴋʟʏɴ, 1930ꜱ

“For fuck’s sake, Steve. You’re sick. Now sit your ass down.” Bucky sighed, rubbing his hand over his face. The three of you, you, Bucky, and Steve, had been a trio since practically birth. You’d helped each other through a lot. Bucky always had his sights set on some beautiful lady, and your sights were set on Steve. You know, if he’d notice it. 

“‘M not sick.” Steve slurred out, and you resisted the urge to laugh. His fever was high, and the pain medication only amplified the effects.

“Steve, you’re burning up and shivering at the same time. Just..at least sit on the couch.” You attempted to bargain with him. “Please? For me?”

“Fine.” He grumbled, plopping down on the couch. You glanced at Bucky, who was looking at you. Bucky shrugged slightly, not sure what to do. 

“Thanks. Buck’s gonna go get you some soup, okay?” You sat down next to your smaller friend as Bucky walked a few steps away to the kitchen.

“M’kay.” Steve yawned. 

“Are you feeling better? At least, compared to earlier?”

He nodded, still a bit loopy. Bucky came back with a bowl of soup, setting it down on the coffee table. “Eat up, punk.”

After he finished eating, you walked him to his bed, hoping that he wouldn't resist. And he didn’t, opting to quietly lay down. You sat on the edge of the bed, staring into his beautiful blue eyes.

“Stay?” He asked quietly, his small and ice-cold fingers finding their way to yours. 

“Course I will, Steve.” Rubbing circles into the back of his hand with your thumbs, you let out a sigh. “I always will.” 

He smiled at that. “I like you a lot, Y/n.” 

“I like you too. A lot.” 

He drifted off to sleep, his hand tucked in yours.

------------------------

ɴᴇᴡ ʏᴏʀᴋ ᴄɪᴛʏ, 2016

Steve’s eyes drifted away from his notebook at the faint sound of sneezing. A younger couple, maybe in their early twenties, walked hand-in-hand down the street. A woman and a man, the man significantly smaller than the woman. Steve noticed the way he looked at her, eyes filled with love and admiration. Her eyes were bright and excited, and she looked at him every so often as she talked about something. 

They were both dressed in their cold weather clothing, scarves and gloves and hats and jackets. Steve smiled softly, imagining you like that. 

The man coughed, more of a wheezing, painful sound. Steve winced. He didn’t have to imagine himself like that. He could remember it clearly, the struggle to breathe, his throat feeling like it had been clawed by a raccoon. 

He missed you. He misses you every day. He was lucky to have Bucky back, and he was grateful. But that didn’t stop him from wanting you. Your kind smile, your gentle gaze. The way you made him feel less…less. 

But you weren’t coming back. He was sure of it. Hell, he’d found your gravestone. You’d died unmarried, with no children. You’d become a nurse at a children’s hospital, which he'd found out from Natasha searching for information about you online.

Steve felt a pang of sorrow as he watched the couple walk farther down the street. With them, it felt like his past and everything he knew was walking away too. He wished he’d had more time to spend with you, to tell you how he’d really felt about you back then. He yearned for you, to be able to take back all of those times where he could’ve kissed you, yet didn’t. Before he knew it, he’d run out of time to spend with you. He couldn’t replace you. Not with Sharon, or Natasha, or Sam, or even Peggy. In a world full of people, people who idolized and adored him, people who dedicated their lives to collecting his trading cards, he still felt alone. 

He truly was a man out of time.

[floralcavern]

Ezekiel and Raya (OCs)

If what the characters are saying is in < >, that means they’re speaking a different language! I’m not gonna trust google translate lol

Raya was the screwup kid compared to her younger brother, Iwan. Not like he was really any better. He was just a mama’s boy. But she didn’t care. She wasn’t so heartbroken that her brother was their mom’s favorite. She just didn’t see any reason to care. It seemed pointless. Raya wasn’t really overly affectionate with either of her parents. Her dad gets it. Especially after the accident, he’s not super overly touchy. Though he does appreciate quality time with Raya. But her and mom… that was another story.

“<Raya, are you really going to major in language arts? What will you do with a degree like that?>”

Raya just shrugs. “I don’t know what I’m gonna do in general after I graduate, mom.”

“<Geez. Well, if you’re going to college for a degree like that, at least speak back to me in Arabic.>”

“<Yes, mom,>” Raya says boredly, hardly able to bring herself to care about her mom's nagging.

Raya walks over to the garage. This used to be dad’s work studio, but since he can’t glass blow anymore, Iwan took over. 

“Man, it’s hot in here,” Raya says as she steps in.

Her brother turns to her. His dyed blonde hair was beginning to fade, his roots growing out. “Did you convince mom to let you go into language arts?”

Raya makes a so-so gesture with her hand. “It wasn’t really hard. I think she’s kind of given up on me.”

Iwan gives her a concerned look. “Cmon, don’t say that.”

“After she busted me smoking last year? I think I have that right.”

“OK, well… she does care about you,” he says, tilting his head and crossing his arms.

“It’s not like it matters. I don’t really care what she thinks.”

Her brother gave her an unconvinced look. Ya, he knew her well. But she really didn’t care. Honest. Like, why does it matter? She’s moving away and it’s not like her mom can keep her from doing stuff her way. 

“Well, Raya.. I hope you do well in college.”

“Ya, thanks. And have you gotten anything back from that fancy magic school you wanna go to?”

“Not yet. But we both know I’m gonna get in.”

She rolls her eyes. “Ya, ya, child prodigy.”

She waved by to him and stepped out, walking to the kitchen to grab herself a snack when she saw her dad. He was standing to grab something from the cupboard, his wheelchair right behind him, blocking her way.

He turns to her and waves, signing, Want some Hojuelitas?

Raya’s nose wrinkles and she shakes her head.She doesn’t get her dad’s obsession with those things. Back when they used to live in Bonao, that waa the only snack that they had in the house. Now, her dad has to order them online to get them.

She sits on the bar stool and watches her dad. Despite her mom’s disappointment in how Raya’s life was going, he always supported her in the end. Maybe because he was always a bit of a free spirit himself. Traveling the world on his motorbike all in his early and mid 20s before meeting mom on a trip to Oman.The two fell in love and settled down and blah blah blah, gross stuff like that. Love honestly seemed overrated.

She waves her arm to get her dad’s attention and signed, How do you feel about my major?

He thinks for a moment before smiling and responding, It suits you. You’ve always been great at Spanish, Arabic, and English. And after the accident, you were quick to learn sign.

Raya smiles, hugging her knees. Her dad was awesome. He was always in her corner. She appreciated it.

She leans back in the chair and looks at the ceiling. 

In the end, she probably won’t miss much about this place.

… 

A few months later, Raya has been at this school for around 6 months now. And college is just as bland as high school. She just stayed in her dorm room and smoked some weed and stayed up late because she procrastinated on her homework, or she might read a book she checked out from the library. But this was about the same routine as it was back in high school. Nothing’s changed.

Even her roommate was about as forgettable as every other classmate she’s had. Maybe she was just a nihilist. That would certainly explain some things. That would be funny, considering her favorite movie was the Big Lebowski. Wait, if she has a favorite anything, does that still qualify her as a candidate for being a nihilist? Ah, whatever. Stupid labels like that were a waste of time, anyways.

She heard a ping come from her cellphone and she was reminded for the one millionth time that she needs to put her phone on silent.

It was an email from her teacher. It reads:

Hello, Raya! I have an opportunity for you that I was wondering if you’d be interested in. We have a transfer student from Israel who doesn’t speak English all too well. I was hoping you’d be interested in teaching him? Email me back your answer!

Raya’s nose wrinkled. She wasn’t interested in babysitting some transfer student. She was taking language arts for herself, not to teach other people.She knew why this teacher chose Raya, and it wasn’t just because she was really good at Hebrew. But it was also because that teacher is all about ‘the college experience’ and ‘putting yourself out there’ and ‘getting out of your comfort zone.’ Making her the unstoppable force to Raya’s immovable object. But, this teacher has been bugging her a lot, so maybe if she does this one thing, she’ll leave her alone for the rest of the semester.

So, reluctantly, Raya responds with Sure.

And now, on a Friday evening when she could be in her room doing what she wanted, she was in the library with some guy who looked about as boring as everyone else she’s met. A mop of brown hair that hung awkwardly over his face, glasses with frames too big for him, and clothes that reminded her of an elementary schooler who was dressed by his mom in the morning. So, a total dork. He seemed like the kind of nerd character that would be in a John Hughes movie.

“So, you’re Ezekiel Aharon, right?”

The boy looked at her intensely and nodded, thinking about his words before very slowly saying, “And you are Raya Peña,” he states in a matter of fact tone. Wow, he seemed almost as annoyed to be here as she was. Which didn’t seem all that fair. She’s the one who’s being forced to do this.

“Yep. Now, what are you struggling with in English?”

Ezekiel looked at her closely, repeating back to her, “Struggling?”

She let out a groan and repeated the sentence to him in Hebrew, to which he nodded and answered, “<Almost everything.>”

Raya hissed quietly in annoyance. She should ask that teacher to give her some extra credit for this, because this is going to be frustrating.

He takes out a Hebrew to English dictionary and repeats back to her some sentences he knows because they’re super basic to be taught. Sentences like, “How are you?” “Where is the gas station?” “Can I order the…” This was so boring she thought she was going to die.

“<OK.. So I’ve gotta teach you a lot. Didn’t you learn English in Israel?”

The boy blushes a bit in discomfiture. “<I was no good.>

She sinks in her chair. Great. If actual teachers couldn’t get this guy to learn English, how can she?

She pulled out her laptop and went to Amazon.

“<What are you doing?>” he asks.

“<Ordering a textbook.>”

His eyes widened and his blush of shame only deepened. “<Sorry.>”

“<It’s whatever.>”

She ordered the textbook, which should be coming in next week. “<Let’s meet up again on Thursday of next week.>”

Ezekiel nodded and Raya stood up, grabbing her bag and stuffing her laptop back into it. When she notices Ezekiel not moving, she gives him a curious look. “<You can leave now.>”

“<Oh, I just need to call in an Uber. I don’t have a car, so.>”

“<You haven’t rented one yet?>”

“<I keep putting it off.>”

Raya wanted to judge him for something so stupid, but then she remembered just the other night she stayed up until 3 am because she wasted a whole month on not working on a project. So she didn’t judge him.

“<I’ll give you a ride.>”

He seemed surprised by this, and she was surprised too. She never offered to help anyone. Ugh. Was she becoming the nice, helpful person that the teacher wanted her to be? Disgusting. But she can’t take back the offer now.

“<If it’s no trouble.>”

She shrugs and leads him to her car, a small, rusted truck that used to belong to her dad. They were going to give it to Iwan, but Iwan said that he wanted one of dad’s old motorbikes instead. Mom hated the idea, but dad, despite the accident, was happy to give it to him.

Ezekiel got into the passenger seat and Raya debated making him pay her. Afterall, he was going to order an Uber anyways. She decided not to, though. She wasn’t that cold. 

“<Where do I take you?>”

Ezekiel told her his address and she nodded, setting up her GPS on her phone and following the map.

One thing that Raya quickly came to learn about Ezekiel was that he cannot stand silence. Every time there was a pause, he had to fill it with obscure facts or stories of his childhood. Just in a 20 minute car ride, she knew way too much about this one guy. He was from Be'er-Sheva, was the youngest of 2 older sisters, liked math, birdwatching, and candle making. He was 20 years old and came to this school because his aunt went to this school and she always talked about how great it was. And damn, he talked a lot about his family. Saying how much he misses them and how it’s not the same without them and cheesy stuff like that. Honestly, she’s been indifferent with her family. Her and Iwan only interact by texting each other memes every now and then, dad usually texts her every other morning to tell her to have a good day, and mom… she just texts to ask how her grades are doing. But none of her family has even called. So she didn’t understand Ezekiel’s long sighs and homesickness. Raya’s never really felt homesickness ever in her life. She is where she is, and she’s never been comfortable or uncomfortable. She just exists and lets herself be there and not care. No where has really felt like home. The closest she can get to is the memory of when she was 8, still living in Bonao, and her dad had just come back from work. He smelled distinctly like Hojuelitas, but instead of being grossed out, she was comforted. For some reason, that day, she really missed her dad. She wasn’t sure why, as it had been a normal day like any other, but when he had come home, it was like the world was just better. That was the closest thing she’s felt to home. She’s tried recreating that feeling, but she gave up trying a long time ago.

She pulled into the parking lot of the dorms that Ezekiel is staying at. He steps out and waves at her, saying to her in English, “Thank you, Raya.”

She nods. “No prob, Bob.”

He chuckles and walks off into the building. Raya watches him. What a weird guy. 

…

Things kind of went like this for the next 3 months. Raya was now roped into being Ezekiel’s full time ride back to his dorms, which sucked. She now is forcing him to try and speak in English for almost everything, to get him to get used to it, only using Hebrew when he really needs to. And, she also keeps learning more and more about him, much to her dismay. Like how he really wanted a dog as a kid, and brought one home after he found it on the streets, but the dog had turned out to be a coyote. He told this story to her 3 times already. It seemed to be his go to story for when he gets awkward.

She was in the library, waiting for him to get there when she gets a text from her dad.

¡Buenas noches, mi princesa! Espero que la escuela te esté yendo bien. ¡No olvides cenar y hacer tu tarea!

She chuckles at her dad’s flowery language. He was always so positive. She responds by liking the message and looks up when she sees Ezekiel coming, and he looks different.

“You got a haircut,” she notes.

“Oh, yes. My barber,” he stumbles a bit on the word ‘barber’,”accidentally messed up. He had to fix it, the best outcome was giving me an under the cut.”

“Undercut,” she corrects him. “And it looks good. You look less like your mom cut your hair.”

He blushes at this. “I’ve had the same haircut since I was 11.”

She snorts. “Well that explains it. Next we gotta fix your fashion.”

He pouts at this. “What is wrong with my clothing?”

“Nothing. It just looks like it’s choking you.”

“Huh?”

“You just look awkward in it. Reminds me of my brother back when my mom dressed him up for picture day in clothes that he hated.”

He doesn’t respond for a moment, his brain working to translate the sentence before perking up a bit. He sits in the chair across from her. “You have a brother?”

“Hm? Oh, ya. A younger brother by 1 and a half years.”

“That is the most you have told me about yourself.”

“OK. Let’s keep it that way.”

He mopes at that response. “I cannot do all of the talking for the silence.”

“Not all silence needs to be filled. Sometimes, it can just be silence.”

“But is it not… um..” he struggled to find the proper word. “Stifle?”

“Stifling,” she corrects. “And, no. Hearing you try to avoid it makes me want to claw my ears off, though.” “Why?”

“Because it’s painfully awkward.”

“I think silence is more awkward.”

“Well, we’ll just have to agree to disagree, then.”

He crosses his arms. “Well, anyway. Is my English getting better?”

“Ya. You can converse a lot better, even if you’re a bit slow to answer. Surprised I helped more than your teachers. I guess forcing you to speak English was very smart of me.”

“Yes, but I did not appreciate you spraying me with water everytime I messed up.”

“Cmon, I did that on one day.”

“You only didn’t do it again because the library lady was mad with you.”

She laughs a little, which makes Ezekiel snigger, because he’d never heard her laugh and it sounded almost funny hearing one come from her. Not funny in a bad way. Funny in a nice way.

“But what is your family like, Raya?”

“Why do I need to tell?”

“Because I have asked.”

“Asking doesn’t guarantee a response, young grasshopper.”

“Pleeeeeease?”

“You’ll just keep bugging me if I don’t tell you, won’t you?”

“Perhaps.”

“Geez. And I thought you were some anxious dork.”

“It’s easy not to be around you because I have grown accustomed to your… what is it called..? Resting bitch face.”

Raya smirks. Some of the first words she taught Ezekiel were swears. She’s glad he uses them.

“Well… ok, I have a younger brother named Iwan. He’s currently a senior in high school and he’s got a big ego. Like, biiiiiig ego. But, he is naturally talented at almost everything he does, so maybe he has the right to have a big ego. But he’s definitely mom’s favorite.”

Ezekiel’s face turns a bit concerned at this. “Why is that?”

“Because he’s a suckup. Whatever. Our dad doesn’t play favorites, so at least there’s that.”

“You spoke kindly of your brother. What about yourself?”

She shrugs. “What’s there to say? I don’t really have any hobbies. And you know I’m a total bitch.”

“I do not think you are.”

“Why not?”

“You drive me home.”

“That means nothing, Ezekiel.”

“It’s a kind act.”

“It’s an act of pity.”

“Pity can be kindness.”

“When did you get so philosophical?”

He waves his hand in dismissal. “In any case, you deal with me when you do not have to.”

“Well, ya, but I can’t really go back now.”

“You could if you wanted to. But you still choose not to.”

She hums a bit at his statement then just shakes her head. “You give me too much credit.”

He shakes his head back at her. “I think you do not have enough credit.”

“Let’s just get to the lesson.”

“Ah, yes.” He seemed not excited at all for the lesson. He hated lessons, finding them to be boring.

After about an hour and a half, they go out to her car, driving to his dorm like always. However, as they got closer, she realized that the truck was slowing down. 

“Shit.. shiiiiiit!” Raya exclaims. She pulls into the parking lot before her truck breaks down. “No!! Ugh, well, looks like the car finally gave into it’s old age… Shit!’ she yells again, kicking a tire.

“It broke?” Ezekiel said behind her.

She groans. “Yes. Sadly, yes.”

“Is there anyone you can call?”

Raya pulls out her phone and anyone who can help her is currently closed or about to close. “Guess I’m sleeping in my truck tonight.”

“No, no! Don’t do that. It won’t even turn on. You’ll be stuck in a completely hot car with no air.”

“I’ll get a bottle of water or something so I won’t die.”

He shakes his head sternly. “You will not sleep in your car.”

“Well, where do I sleep? Your dorm?”

He perks up at this. “Not a bad idea!”

“Huh? Wait, no, Ezekiel, I was being sarcastic-!”

But it was too late. Before she knew it, she was being dragged into the building, walking up the steps to the third floor, and is now in Ezekiel’s dorm room. This was her worst nightmare. Because now that she was the guest of someone’s home, by the law of politeness that her mom drilled into her at a very young age, she… had to socialize.

Just kill me now, she thought as she sat on the couch.

“Do you want some pomegranate juice?” he asks her.

She really didn’t, but out of forced politeness, she says, “Sure.”

He nods, disappearing into the kitchen and returning with a glass of juice, handing it to her.

She sips a little bit of it and nods. “So, I’ll just sleep on the couch. Your roommate won’t mind, right?”

Ezekiel shakes his head. “He usually spends the night at his girlfriend’s house, anyhow.”

“So you get the whole place to yourself? Lucky.”

“It gets lonely.”

“Ya, I bet it would for you, seeing as how you grew up with a big family.”

He smiles at her. “You listen to my stories?”

“Um.. ya? Why wouldn’t I?”

“Most people just tune me out.”

“Oh.” She’s considered doing that many times, but sometimes in his stories, he’ll say something absolutely crazy that it draws her attention in completely. Plus, as much as she hated to admit it, the guy was really nice, and ignoring him would make her feel really bad. “Well, I haven’t.”

“Thank you, Raya.”

He sits on the couch next to her and now suddenly she feels the awkward silence and damnit, she feels like she’s turning into Ezekiel. “Do you miss them?”

He laughs. “Have I not made it obvious?”

“Well, you have, but.. I just don’t really get what’s there to miss. I go most days not thinking once about my family.”

He gives her a pitying look. “Is that not lonely?”

“I dunno. Not really. I mean, what’s lonely?”

“Well.. it can be different for many people. For me, it’s a desperate desire for someone near me.”

“I don’t feel that. I mostly just feel.. Bored.”

“Is that not also a form of loneliness?”

She thinks about that for a bit. She’d never considered that. “To be frank… I don’t even really care about my family all too much. Like, ya, they’re my family and stuff, but like..I could take or leave them. That’s how I feel about most things.”

“What an awful way to live,” he says bluntly.

“Maybe. I’ve only experienced anything remotely close to how you feel about your family once.”

“What was that like?”

Raya thought about that evening. The smell of Hojuelitas, her dad’s scruffy beard, the way he held her and how she fell asleep in his arms quickly, only to wake up in her bed the next day, the only time she’s felt anything but apathy for waking up in the morning. There really was only one way to describe it. “Almost like a fairytale.”

Ezekiel nods. “I think you just need to find your joy.”

“Maybe joy is just overrated.” “I think cynicism and misery are overrated. You see those themes a lot more in what are considered great works of literature.”

“Look at you using these fancy words,” she smiles. “Damn, I’m a good teacher.”

He rolls his eyes and hands her a blanket. “Whimsy is where fulfillment lies, I think.”

“Ya, well… maybe you’re just enlightened in a way I’m not.”

He bellows out a laugh. “I’m anything but.”

“I’m serious, Ezekiel. Really, I am.”

He doesn’t say anything.

“Why do you love your family?” Raya asks.

He looks at her and smiles before shrugging. “Because love is where the force of the world holds purity, without it would be ruin.”

He steps out, going to his room and Raya wonders where he may have stolen that quote from. It sounds straight out of a motivational poster you would see in a guidance counselor’s office.

But even still… She thinks about what he said for a moment before grabbing her phone. She stares at the screen for a couple of minutes before opening it and going to the family groupchat. Raya hasn’t texted in this groupchat in over a year. And she had to think.

Why did she just not care?

And why did she care so much about the fact that she didn’t care?

She was a walking paradox of apathy and overwhelming anxiety.

And she realizes something. This is the first time in a long time she’s felt really.. Anything. And it’s in the home of some random boy she tutors.

But as she feels the warm blanket, the stiff couch, the taste of pomegranate juice, and the smell of a homemade candle, she can’t help but wonder if this is what home feels like? It was almost like that memory with her dad, but with the opposite emotion. And what was home but not a swirl of all kinds of different emotions and memories and feelings? That was how it was supposed to be.

Here, on the couch of a boy she wanted so badly to feel indifferent to, she felt at home.

She goes to Ezekiel’s room and knocks on the door. He opens it.

“You’ve been crying,” he notes.

“Have I?”

“I think so.”

She wipes her face with the back of her hand. She observes him and she feels like she’s seeing him for the first time. He doesn’t have a forgettable face. He has a mole on his neck and under his eye, he has a round face, he has a dopey smile, he has gray eyes, he has dimples. And he is the most interesting person she’s ever seen in her life. “I think I felt something,” she says. “And I don’t know what to do.” She hated how much she sounded like a child.

He smiles a bit and laughs, shaking his head. “Raya. You don’t need to do anything. You just need to feel.”

“How do you know all this stuff?”

“Because I know myself.”

She shakes her head. “I don’t think I know myself at all.”

“Well… I can help.”

She wants to cringe, because she knows this is cheesy and she’s being cheesy, and this is all so dumb, and feelings are dumb, but damnit… Damnit… This was the most warm she’s felt since she was held by her dad that one evening, that one memory that kept her from thinking she was incapable of emotions.

“I want help. I think. No, no, I definitely do.”

He laughs and takes her hand. “And that’s the first step.”

[kanmom51]

JM Like crazy - my crazy thoughts

First of all, stream stream stream.

Now, let's talk about Like crazy a little.

I'm trying to soak it all in, so I will probably miss some stuff, but I'll give it a try.

The visuals are incredible, no doubt.

And the message is there, a little hidden, a little double twisted, so to speak, because I see what people are throwing out there. All heteronormative and all.

But peeps (gosh, I've been loving using that word lately), I see so much more than a man and a woman, that don't interact, did you notice that part all of you that are saying he's going in to kiss her. Like where the hell did you get that idea from?

I'm not going to do a second by second breakdown of the clip but I'm going to leave you with a few of my thoughts.

Oh, and so fucking what if he starts it out with "she"...does that mean the song is about a her? I really really don't think so. But I'll get to that.

This is a good explanation about the she:

Dropping this pic here too...

Oh, and I don't remember, did I say the English lyrics are different than the Korean. Imma gonna talk about the Korean, cause they're the ones that are on the clip, not to mention they are more telling, in my opinion.

Ok then, let's get going...

JM in the club.

Standing alone.

Zoom in on the eye then zoom out, flashback Serendipity. And why do I say Serendipity you ask? Well, because, you'll see ya'll. Stop being so impatient.

When he's singing:

"She's saying: Baby, don't think about it There's not a bad thing here tonight..."

The room is clean.

It goes on:

"baby it's fine if you leave, stay with me just for today" - room turns muddy, dirty.

That's where I feel the quote ends.

The she explained above makes so much sense in this context.

He continues with

"watch me go keep me drenched all night (away), so that morning gets drunk and never comes..."

I'm getting used to it

Did I come too far to find the me you used to know?

Yeah I know

You know

I know

I'd rather be...

Something look familiar?

Perhaps certain "I know you know I know" lyrics?

He is running into that bar/club and he's alone, he's drinking, he's 'having fun', but at the same time he's not, and when he's dancing and making contact with another, he has his arm around another guy.

This

Him walking against the stream, looked at, perhaps judged, and singing

I'd rather be lost in the lights I'm outta my mind

Please hold onto the end of the night...

walls closing in on him (hallway narrower than it was a second ago).

Now this part in the lyrics.

Nah, I will not accept any other interpretation (though I know there are hundreds of them), but nope, this is mine and I'm sticking with it:

Each night

you spin me up high

(psss...the dirt again people)

the moon embraces you

Let me have a taste

Give me a good ride

Ooh, surprise a queer couple...

Oh, and the colours...do we have gold/yellow and purple?

We have people making out, not JM. JM is by himself. It adds to the feeling of loneliness.

He's singing

forever you and I', but he's standing alone...

Then the bathroom scene.

Again he's alone.

I'm going endlessly crazy

I'd rather be lost in the lights

I'm outta my mind

(bathroom walls coming apart, leaving him standing alone...

Each night

You spin me up high

The moon embraces me

Let me have a taste

All while he's here:

Yes, he's 'showcasing' a hetero couple, but once again he's standing or sitting on that screen alone.

We have a hetero couple shown all while he's singing about what he'd rather be doing...

Then again, repeats the "give me a good ride", again standing alone in the crowd.

It's gonna be a good night

(oh I'm falling)

Forever you and I

No don't you wake me

I wanna stay in this dream, don't save me

I need a way we

I need a way we can dream on

Euphoria vibes much?

"Won't you please stay in my dreams, yeah...

Even if the earth crumbles No matter who shakes this world Don't let go of my hand Please don't wake me up from this dream"

Pausing one second here, crying a little.

Moving on...

He walks back into the room, on the way he's leaving muddy footprints, the room is dirty, muddy, his hands smeared with mud, which he spreads on the screen.

Yeah, every single work I say here can be total crap.

But it can also be all true. I certainly feel like it is.

There are too many references. Coincidences once again?

I don't think so.

Oh, and there's this:

That's it for now folks.

If I have more thoughts on the matter, I'll definitley come back.

This is me writing a few crazy thoughts after watching Like crazy a few times.

Go stream!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[wolfawaycamp]

Jacob&Kaitlyn being besties and supporting each others bad decisions pre-bonfire/werewolf night

They’re both lying spread eagle on the deck outside the boathouse, faces turned up toward the crescent moon gleaming high above them. It’s only the sixth night of camp — only the fifth with campers actually present — and yet the daytime heat of June has already reached levels beyond oppressive, leaving everyone worn out and crabby by the end of the evenings. Kaitlyn and Jacob were tasked with sorting through all of the lifejackets in the camp’s inventory, double and triple checking that everything was functioning correctly before the kids were allowed their first bit of free time on the lake the following morning.

Technically speaking, they’re done; they’d been done for a good twenty minutes now, in truth. But the gentle splashing of the water beneath the dock lapping against the shoreline is rhythmic and lullaby-esque, and the sun has been gone long enough for the miserable heat to have faded, but the deck boards have retained just enough warmth to feel comfortable at their backs.

And so, they remain side by side sprawled on the faded old wooden planks. It’s the most peaceful and relaxed Kaitlyn can remember feeling in a number of months; since high school graduation, probably. So of course Jake had to go and fucking ruin it.

“I asked Emma out,” the boy said; he’s relaxed on his back just like she is, so his voice is a low mumble that takes her a few seconds to process.

As soon as they register, Kaitlyn groans.

“The blonde chick?” she asks begrudgingly.

She already knows this isn’t going to end well; she’s known Jacob their entire lives and the boy’s a bleeding heart with no sense of caution whatsoever, and she’s long-since grown weary of comforting him after extremely predictable heartbreaks.

“The blonde chick,” Jacob mocks in an utterly silly voice. “We’ve all been here for a week and you’re not stupid, Kaity. Don’t act like you don’t know her name!”

“Ugh, fine,” the girl concedes, disgusted. “What the hell does out even mean here? You can’t leave and there’s nothing to do outside of the normal camp activities! With little kids everywhere!”

“Hey, language! I don’t wanna get stuck with bathroom cleaning duty, dude!”

“Oh fuck off,” she snorts. “There’s literally no kids around—”

“That you know of!”

“If there’s a kid out here by the docks at 9pm when they’re all supposed to be inside the lodge watching a movie right now, they’d be in bigger trouble for that than we would be for swearing,” Kaitlyn challenges. “Anyway, as I was saying… what the fuck are you even gonna do for a date, Jacob?”

“I dunno,” he shrugs, then wiggles his eyebrows with a positively shiteating grin that Kaitlyn can somehow perfectly sense despite not facing him directly. “I mean I guess there’s always skinnydipping, eyyy?”

She swings wildly, managing to connect and solidly smack his shoulder despite the way he rolls, laughing, in an attempt to dodge the strike.

“Ugh, and you had the audacity to scold me for swearing right before suggesting that…”

They’re both quiet for a moment while the laughter fades away.

“She said yes but just as a summer thing y’know? No strings after camp—”

“Jake.”

“I really like her though—”

“Jake.”

“Whaaaat?” he whines.

“This is a terrible idea and I want that noted on the record,” Kaitlyn declares. “You’re gonna be crying at the end of camp, mark my words.”

“Yeah, yeah, whatever… you know, you miss one hundred percent of the shots you don’t ta—”

The boy cuts off with a grunt and a bark of laughter as she swats wildly at him again, connecting with his chest with a solid thwack.

“Ugh, I hate you,” Kaitlyn groans, as if it’s not completely negated by the grin on her face.

Then she sighs.

“Gimme your slice of pie at dinner tomorrow night and I’ll cover for you while you two are out of your cabins,” she promises, resigned.

“Oh hell yeah, done! Thanks. You’re the best, Kaity!”

“Yeah and don’t you fucking forget it.”

🐦‍⬛